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It’s Breezy on painkillers, bytch! Yeah, I’m in a lot of pain tonight, but I know y’all don’t give a f*ck so lemme just get into it...

This is the SECOND TO LAST episode of Celebrity Rap Superstar, which I know most of you are THRILLED about. But you gotta admit, it’s been quite the lil’ experience. Perez summoning the Gay Mafia while doing Kanye’s “Jesus Walks”, the Jason Wahler taking the show as serious as Bobby Brown’s heart attack, Efren Ramirez, also known as the Lil’ Vato That Could.... yeah, MTV DEFINITELY pushed it with this one.

And now, it’s almost over.

Does this mean that Andy Milonakis’ show is gonna come back? Now HE was the sh*t!

So far, two of the celebs are going to be going to go head-to-head to battle it out to see who is going to the final two...which basically means... either Kendra or Sebastian Bach are going head to head to take it against Shar in the finals.

OMG.... MTV just lost ANY kind of credibility that they desperately clung to tighter than Marion Jones’ reluctance to relinquish her Olympic medals. Kid Rock’s daddy is going home! That’s right, Sebby! Tell ‘em off! America doesn’t suckâ€" it’s those f*ckin drunk white boys that suck! How y’all gonna do my mans dirty like that? Are you voting on Kendra's skills, or on her outfits? This isn’t Celebrity Rack Superstar! But he just dropped some knowledgeâ€" his new album, Angel Down is coming out later this year and DMC and Kurupt will be featured guests. I might have to download that. Then, K. Hart got the nerve to say, “but we want you to perform at the end of the show, though!”

Sebastian Bach, if you're reading this, you are waaaay too nice, dude. The proper response to that would be to scream, “f*ck you, Choco-Smurf! I’m out!” then throw up the rock devil horns, exiting stage right. But whatever.

First of all, let me say thanks for the love for the Scarface joint and for also telling off that A$SHOLE that disrespected my cousin’s memory. I love y’all for thatâ€" you guys really know how to hold a chick down when it’s time to.

Also, your other Throwback video requests have been duly noted... you just gotta check back each Thursday to see what’s gonna go down. You may be pleasantly surprised.

So, if y’all watched last week, you’ll notice that Count Vee is no longer with the show. Yeah, she got eliminated because she fell ill. I’m sure Warren G is at her bedside, waiting on her hand and foot so he can get a chance to feel up on that silicone filled booty. I ain’t mad atcha, G. Feel better, Count Vee! Sometimes a mad gangsta f*ck is just what you need to set ya straight.

The top two performers are safe. The last two have to battle it out and the voters have to send one home. At the top the show, Shar and Puss in Boots (Kendra) are in the top spots, so its down to Perez and Sebastian Bach.

Now, BOOM! Guess who stepped in the room?

Hey, y'all.

Now, I've noticed that some of you don't care very much for Celebrity Rap Superstar... which is understandable, to each his/her own, ya dig? But I know that ALOT of you are definitely looking forward to the new, upcoming season of I Love New York (and that reason is beyond me). However, despite MY personal feelings toward the show, I will be recapping it when it premieres October 8th. So sit tight, your regularly scheduled buffoonery is closer than you think.

But, like I mentioned yesterday, I have a lil' surprise for y'all...

And I do mean little.

Below is one of the casting videos from a new I Love New York contestant, who obviously is related to Lil' Wanye in some way. (NOTE: If you have a fear of small people, DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEO!)

So, what's your opinion of Midget Mack? Do you think New York's mama will approve?

Wassup y'all!

This week on Celebrity Rap Superstar, our lucky contestants got to COME UP WITH THEIR OWN RAP? Yes, it's going down.

Before we even get into that, something just dawned on me: Does it bother anyone that Da Brat is one of the judges, and MC Lyte is a mentor? Think about it this way. If legendary DMC is a judge, then shouldn't Lyte be, too? I know Da Brat is kind of popular amongst the reality tv circuit now, but come on, MTV, what the hell? What's next, T-Pain judging an r&b contest while Brian McKnight merely spectates?! Am I wrong/right? Let me know what you think!

As far as the show goes: Efren Ramirez (NO SURPRISE) is in the bottom, and so is Sebastian Bach (WHAT THE F*CK? HELLO, JASON WAHLER IS STILL THERE!) One of them is going home. There’s going to be a showdown, because the votes were so close that there has to be a “rap-off” and the judges gotta pick the winner.

Do we even have to go through this painful debacle to know who Brat, Big Boy, and DMC are going to pick? I mean, let's be real here.

But alas, on to the performances...
(and I'm warning you, everybody's abbreviating their names. Nobody could rack their brains to come up with anything remotely creative. Sigh...)

Check out this video... towards the end you get a sneak peek of a lil' sample of Perez' rap.

Aight, before I get into the recap, I just want to say that I read ALL of the comments you guys left last week about how this show is killing hip-hop and what not. I sayâ€" it ain’t that serious. Just think of it as karaoke... that’s basically what this is. How is this different from what you do in front of your mirror, pretending to be Michael Jackson, Salt-N-Pepa or even Diddy (like you ain’t never tried to do the Harlem Shake, even though you were 23 when it came out).

I mean... look at it, for goodness sakes.