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Celebrity Rap Superstar -- What Did You Think?
Posted on August 31, 2007 9:00 AM
Before I started watching this show, I thought, "oh wait, is this going to be The Surreal Life-- Rap Style?"
Hmm. Was I right?
Ehh.. sort of.
Basically, little Kevin Hart is hosting this "Rapping With the Stars" show. Eight semi-celebs are teamed up with rappers who act as coaches, teaching them to perform rap songs in front of an audience. Not only do we, the people at home (if you actually give a sh*t) get to pick who's voted off each week, they're judged by the "Supreme Court of Hip-Hop", which, unfortunately, consists of Da Brat, Big Boi (the formerly fat DJ who must've taken up smoking crack as a hobby, 'cuz this dude is SKIIIIIIIINNEEEE) and DMC... that DMC, the only person that I agree SHOULD be on this panel. YEAH, UNCLE RAHIEM IS GONNA TELL THEM MUTHAF*CKAS GRIP UP, GRIP UP! Sorry, I'm still hyped about that song, which is now frequently played on my MP3.
So, to make this easier on myself, I'm just gonna break down each duo, and give my lil' two cents on how I think they did.
But to sum it up-- I'm gonna check in for the next seven weeks. I HAVE to see who's gonna take this.
Tone Loc and Perez Hilton-- First of all, can you believe that the frog in Loc's throat is still alive after twenty-something years? Damnn n*gga, you need to get that operated or something! Stop drinking that Funky Cold Medina! And as far Perez... this is the first time I've seen him, and honestly, I thought he was going to be a hot, tanned, chiseled gay guy. I was only right about the gay part. But I gotta admit-- it was funny the way he gayed up Chingy's "Right Thurr". You betta work!
Redman and Jamal Anderson-- Yeap, Redman emerged from the purple haze to teach Anderson how to get "Big Things Poppin'." He failed. I'd still smash that, though. DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!
Too $hort and Kendra Wilkinson-- Aight, out of all the h*es in Hugh Hef's stables, why they had to pick this ugly chick? I'm sorry, she ain't cute. She performed Foxy Brown's "Candy", and it was lackluster. What was funny was that she said that what was wrong about her performance was that she needed to learn how to breathe, but I'm sure she'll get the hang of it after blowing Hef for like the thousandth time. And you peeped him in the audience right? Daddy gotta keep an eye on his h*es. Someone else had the eyes for her too -- Da Brat! She was criticizing her, but you could tell that Kendra made Brat's boxers moist.
Bubba Sparxxx and Jason Wahler-- Who? Oh yeah, that kid from Laguna Hills or some sh*t like that. He performed "Ridin' Dirty". Not only did he do a terrible job, but when he came out, he tripped up like he was trying to jump into a mosh pit! Naw, my wigga. You're going home.
MC Lyte and Shar Jackson-- Thank G-d someone found some way for Shar to support all those damn kids Federline left her with! But she was one of the best performers of the night... homegirl rocked that "Tambourine" almost better than Eve did!
Warren G and Countess Vaughan-- Wait, how they gonna put Countess and Shar on the same show?! Sh*t, if that's the case, then throw Ray J on up there. Maybe he'd actually get some talent, and won't have to release one single every three years.
ANYWAY, Countess was also a surprise. She did rather well performing "Lip Gloss". She was right, the song is cutesy, and she's cutesy, so it fit her. Guys-- would you hit C.V.? I know I always make known my preference in the fellas, but I'm curious to know if y'all think Countess is sexy. Don't ask me why.
Kurupt and Sebastian Bach-- Is it a shame that I'm more familiar with Sebastian Bach's music than Kurupt's? I only remember that wack song he did with the chick from Blaque. Are they even still together? Anyway, Sebastian does a super-amped up version of LL's "Mama Said Knock You Out". It was a little scary to me. But he did get all the lyrics.
Bizarre and Efren Ramirez-- First of all, the shower cap is played out. No one thinks it's funny, Bizarre. Give that sh*t back to your Momma RIGHT NOW. And Efren? He should decide whether or not he wants to speak in your English accent or your Spanish accent, he kept switching up and that ish is annoying. His version of "In Da Club" was very, very bizarre. It was like hearing William Hung do it-- now THAT'S who sould be on this show!
At the end of the show, the judges were allowed to pick one person each that would be saved from elimination.
DMC's pick: Sebastian Bach.
Da Brat's pick: Shar Jackson (but she really didn't need protection)
Big Boi's pick: Perez Hilton (this decision highly disturbs me)
My prediction? Shar's gonna win this thing-- if Countess can't find any more "I'm-so-cute" rap tracks to perform. If Shar does win though, I hope they give her some money to start her kids up a college fund or something, 'cuz leave it up to K-Fed, they'll be attending 54th and Crenshaw University.
Before I wrap this thing up, I just want to ask -- if any of y'all have custom made Nikes, are they worth it? I'm thinking about ordering two pairs online. Last fall, I got a pair of custom made Timberlands with my initials on them that I love to death. Yeah, Breezy's the black Carrie Bradshaw of this b*tch-- no, not that my face resembles a crow, but I'm short, love to write and run my mouth. Plus I have a mean shoe/sneaker/Timbs fetish. I'm not on Christian Louboutin level... YET, but like Ashanti said, "if ya budget don't have it, I ain't mad at Steve Madden," and that's the best thing to come out of her mouth since Nelly's jism.
Anyway, let me know what you think about the show and the Nikes.
Comments
Start a business online - MrSuccessful.com
Breezy,
I'm so proud of you for being able to pull a recap out of this bullsh*t. I was traumatized the whole time. Shar and Countess were cool though. Shar pulled the black girl out didn't she? I was shocked after her extreme valley girl speak during the interview.
I'll try to watch next week so I get the recaps as long as there is absolutely nothing else on that I want to watch.
This is worse than Crank Dat Soljia Boy.
SMH at the rappers that contributed at it.... and ya'll say these young "ring tone rappers" Are kiling hip hop? Guess what Red Man, Tone Loc, Too Short, DMC...etc are doing?
@ Breezy
From a female view I think Countess Vaughan cute, but would NEVER touch or think about it. And for some reason I feel like she's childish.
Also thanks for the recap because I missed the showing. When the next one coming on.
I had never heard about this show before i cought it when it was first coming on. I thought i'd watch to see what it was about.
Take it for what it's worth...Entertainment. Obviously none of these people will ever be rappers. At least they gain a bit of respect for realizing what it takes to be a rapper even though they're just reciting lyrics and not coming up with them themselves.
I'm not mad though. Jason from the Hills was mad funny. You can tell he was a typical white boy. But like Bubba said, he did have the hardest song. Chamillionair's lyrics are super fast and complex.
Now on to you Breezy. Yes, your face does look like a crow, and your wack! Don't nobody care about your sneakers or your personal life. Just stick with the celebrity news!
Other than that this is pretty much a Celebrity Fit Club reunion that didn't need to happen.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
@ Bird
LoL! it was that bad?
And thanks for your recap too.
@ VICTOR
You can't compare this show and ringtone rappers. This is not to be taken serious. If this was really something that would shed a negative light on rap, there's no way MC Light, DMC and especially Red Man would have anything to do with it. Obviously you missed the point. It's just light hearted fun. They're making fun of the people trying to rap, not rap itself.
Now where do i start, oh okay
I only caught the last 10 minuets of it, but i can't lie, it looks more entertaining than i thought. if u can't already tell who the best people are gonna be(the black chicks of course), u don't need to listend to rap anymore. Perez Hilton looks like he smells like pee, and his mustache looks like the results of a dirty sanchez.
would i smash Countless Vaughn.....hell no. i don't do Ompa Loompas with faces like pug dogs. i feel kind of sorry for her though. all that work she been putting in over the years on 'Moesha' and 'My Fat Moma' (the parkers), playing the dumb, less attractive/witty boycrazy, sidekick/love child is going to have her typecasted for the rest of her career. who knows, she might actually have real acting talent under need all that bafoonery.
I saw a few minutes of it (I saw Shar and thought 'Damn Rudy Huxtable den got fat.')
It was pretty bad and cable TV would be better off without it, but I know I'm gonna see it cuz MTV will play it 4 times a day every week (like VH1 did with the White Rapper Show.)
I saw Countess Vaughn... didn't she have a booty implant or somethin? I was lookin for it--I'm not impressed. She looks like she got bigger, or she is pregnant or somethin.
I love Lyte, get ya money, as well as Red, DMC and the rest. But I wouldn't be mad if they cancelled this wack show immediately, like "The Shop."
This show is a fuckin mockery of rap if anything & another attempt 2 save these has beens careers. WTF is Too $hort doing on some sell out shit like this? It's obvious that this show is for white folks who don't have a fuckin clue about rap or hip hop culture. I'm tired of these fuckin networks investing 100's of thousands of dollars into bullshit like this, when there are real artist with real talent out here struggling 2 make it! I mean they already doing another "White Rapper Show" & now this bullshit! I'm really begining 2 think hard about what Polow Da Don said in his interview, either blacks are fuckin idiots or white folks are pure genius'! WE GOT 2 DO BETTER AS HUMANS!!!!!!!! IGNORANCE IS BLISSS
Oh Yeah!!!! Just so you know breezy, Countess could get it from me 4 sho! Shiiid, i'd marry her if I had the chance! Them custom Nikes is cool, you should cop them jawns!!! The color schemes are fresh 4 '08!!!! WORD UP!
Shai Jackson, Countess Vaughn and Sebastian Bach really did they thang. I think the only reason they gave that Perez dudette a chance is for ratiings. He is gonna draw so many peole to watch that show, that's the only reason. But I'm rolling with Countess and Shai for the winners.
Breezy, I meant to comment on those custom Nikes... Just make sure you get them from a good site, cause if not you most likely will be in a bootleg pair of 1's and that's not a good look.
Big Boi lost weight because he had weight loss surgery a few years back...get your info straight. He's still one of the best radio dj's in LA. Isn't the blogger supposed to know shit like this before they write?
U kiding me? Id fuck Kendra anyday.
breezy post your pic so i can rate you
Bizarre and Efren Ramirez-- First of all, the shower cap is played out. No one thinks it's funny, Bizarre. Give that sh*t back to your Momma RIGHT NOW.
Damn!!! That shit alone made my day!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!
Shar did that.
That jason kid is racist he got pulled over and called the cops n*&gas.
Pedro was crazy he did bettter than 50.
Streetfact
that was big boy not big boi. big boi is in outkast
Uncle RAHIEM!!?? what u kno about that! That's ma nillz Consequence song no body kno his album was dope! Go cop it "DON'T QUIT YA DAY JOB"
Yo this show is Stupid but Shar Jackson was the best out of all of them. Kendra Sucked. Shar definetely gonna move on.
Yes it's a shame that you arent that familiar with Kurupt's music! Na, jus playin, Im just offended coz I'm a big Young Gotti fan!
i would hang out with countess every friday and saturday night . . . only comment i need to make on this blog
Shame on all the rappers participating in this show. There is not entertaining about it, just straight foolishness.
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