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TALKIN' VIDEOS - the latest HATE on Hip-Hop TV, Movies and Music Videos

I Love New York: "One More Chance?" b/w "Two to Tango?"

Posted on April 3, 2007 12:14 PM

The motorcade parade of bitch niggas has finally concluded!

Have a Pop Tart and a Newport with me this morning as we wave goodbye the Talkin’ Videos way! In the “I Love New York” finale, Tiffany drags Famous the Stallionaire (Chance) and Tango “overseas” for a Mexican adventure that doesn’t involve swallowing and condoms.

Okay… maybe some swallowing.

As much shit as I’ve given the man, I’ve grown quite accustomed to certain Tango-isms. For example, the man refers incessantly to the notion of “preserving [his] sexy.” Sexy is a hell of a lot easier to preserve when you don’t wear the same stankin ass green T-shirt every day.

This episode was one long Tony Montana coke freakout for Chance. Right off the bat, Chance can’t believe brother and fellow Staillionaire Real “got beat by a big ape.” Luckily for us, Cam unravels very early. I hope there’s a Charm School equivalent for the bitch niggas in the works. Chance would make it well worth the time. Better yet, I’d imagined the possibilities had Chance actually won the fucking competition!

FUCK "Being Bobby Brown!" New York & Chance would have that shit on lock.

GASP! Can you picture Chance winning the competition and bringing New York back home for Real and their mama to see?! Real would probably less than appreciate having to hear them fucking on the top bunk. (Come on. You know the Stallionaires are still in mom’s stable.)

I digress. Back to the meltdown.

New York, Chance and The Wango can’t have a five minute discussion without Fabo going into one of his 80s Eddie Murphy rants. All blunt smoke and no fire! What kind of nigga kicks a glass across the table knowing the show’s producers won’t let him get stomped into the shitstain he deserves to be transfigured into?

--A bitch nigga. That’s who.

Once again, Tango refuses to toss some miniature person’s arm to the side and handle his business. He didn’t even have to knock Chance out. He could have just choked him out for a little bit. That would have sufficed. Just look into his beady little eyes and feel him struggle to inhale for about 5 seconds. This nigga talking about cutting you up and shit! In front of your [collective] woman! Fuck all the bullshit. Gotta put that clock around his neck and show him what time it is.

After proving to the world once again that Negroes in this society are best maintained caged, New York decides that the two should be separated for the duration of the competition. She really just wanted to eat all 3 servings of starfish by her damn self. Chance don’t give 2 wet farts about the “mucho delishissa.” He just wants his drink off the table before he rolls.

The ever-reserved Tango lands the first day-date with New York. The party kicks off on the Minnesota Vikings BangBoat and apparently, Tiffy didn’t have enough adhesive on her “real fur” eyelashes. This was Tango’s opportunity to offer her some of his special glue to keep that thang on. He instead chose to keep it classy and offer her his hoagie sandwich to bite.

All this bitch needs is a sandwich and she’s ready to go! As she and Tango get all personal, greasy and see-thru, I can’t help but hear the immortal words of Hoopz over and over in my mind.

“Any bitch that just gon let a nigga fuck… Nigga gon fuck!”

Well, it’s no news to any of us that New York is not opposed to letting niggas fiddle around with the sleeping bat on national television. In this episode, she obviously gets the double shot of gorilla batter, and wakes up ready for the Camay lotion from Chance. She went to meet dude with the post-nut glow still on her!

She had that hunger this week! Homegirl went for the double King Size Snickers! I don’t knock it though. Had to try ‘em out before making that final decision, right? No double standard here. If I can try girls out until I find the one for me, why can’t she bring two types of cheese home in her briefs?

Damn. Chance ain’t never been nowhere. You can tell! This nigga jumpin around like Richard Pryor at every little thing. “Oh shit! A butterfly! Ahh! Dragon! Get me out this crazy place, dammit!” I wanna see footage of Real taking him to the zoo. That's a YouTube classic in the making.

I’m going to sidestep the whole scene where New York is stroking the dolphin’s skin and pondering how nice a bag or seatcovers it would make. However, I must highlight the fact that she asked where the animal’s brain was because of the hole in the head. That dolphin is smarter than you are, simple bitch!

New York won’t play with the damn dophins until Chance shakes her up, slaps her around and roughs her into doing so. This abuse arouses her so much that she skips the post-dolphin meal and goes straight to the fuck scene.

I had long since assumed that Chance was a barber by trade, but in preparation for the elimidate (sorry, Wood), Chance up and does god knows what to his hair. That perm (or whatever you Stallionaires choose to call it) is the 3 Hs. Hideous. Horrible. Horrendous. Nigga head look like one of them extra-terrestrials' from Alien Nation.

Oh, yeah… and check out these niggas goin shopping. Who is paying for all of this? Chance is poppin tags like he knows all this shit is goin on the VH1 expense account. If such is the case, Tango is like “fuck new clothes… these niggas is poppin for some ice!” Why get new clothes? He’s obviously comfortable and a purveyor of green, dirty shit. It’s like he doesn’t hear people calling him Donatello.

Thanks to the Prohibition-era pinstripe number and the derm abrasion, Tango came to elimination looking like Bumpy Johnson. After assuring to Tango that he was her rock (…hard dick) and reminding Chance that they could scrape the glass ceiling of black entertainment by being the new Bobby and Whitney, she made the only intelligent lifestlye choice I’ve seen from her to date by buckling down and selecting Wango.

Chance’s shock and disdain appeared pretty genuine, as did his brother’s. He didn’t wanna play kissy face anymore. He completely let ManBearPig have it outside, and his rant inside the limo was probably the finest 30 seconds of television VH1 has ever produced. Fuck that two-way ass bitch, yo!

“Gimme a hug. Bitch, please! Man, I ain’t huggin’ yo’ ass! I already done slapped yo ass… Shook yo ass… Tapped that ass… Man, get yo ass up outta here.”

He’ll never forget your ass though. Oh, lord. I couldn’t breathe.

Crazy choice-makin ass woman!

I don’t know why Chance is so heated. The home situation will be just fine. Famous is famous for real now. He doesn’t have to pleasure a ManBear offspring. It’s like being an American Idol loser. You’re really the winner!

Sister Patterson should have gotten rid of both of them. She could have bribed Tango with a pack of good franks. Them Nathan’s shits. Maybe even the Best’s... and a big can of Bush's beans! Now she’s gotta deal with what went on while she was celebrating Chance’s departure in her Satan costume.

Tango! We thought you were getting EARRINGS, nigga! We should have known when the jeweler said “that’s the one I would have chosen” as opposed to those are the ones…” Even more insane is that she actually said “yes!”

"Oh shit! What have I just done? Does this mean I’ll have to move to the sewer?"

Don’t worry about the sewer, baby! Worry about that overhand right when Tango sees what you said about ol’ Big Mama! She was part of the struggle, you ungrateful skank!

Oh, shit! Tango’s mom is gonna flip! We gotta get that update, baby!

talkinvideos@sohh.com

So who’s gonna watch Chance’s spinoff series with me?

Posted by Ron Mexico

Comments

  • nupe says...
  • LMAO!!!!!

  • April 3, 2007 2:15 PM
  • nupe says...
  • First!

  • April 3, 2007 2:16 PM
  • lucidity says...
  • hilarious!

  • April 3, 2007 2:19 PM
  • Sinistah aka Sin Piff says...
  • i aint read this shit, but that was the funniest however many minutes i had in my life for a long while. whats even worse, was i was dragged into an internet chatroom full of other derranged and backwards folk who's elevators dont rise too high, lmaoo.

    too many memorable thoughts to name in that one, but alot of disturbing shit went down in that one.

    NY looked like she was bout to mutate into her moms while they was playin with the sealife.

    Chance tellin her moms he blew dat back out as well as bout to go smoke a blunt in a valliant effort to become the first TV personality to mesh Flav and Bobby Brown into one persona.

    aww man, i'd probably have to get at ya'll on a recap note for this.

    all my real niggaz i would announce that the show Monique hosting "Charm School" is filled wit enough T&A for a softcore porn flick.

    on dat note, i'm outty, at work and it's always possible that i got "Feds Takin Pictures"

  • April 3, 2007 2:29 PM
  • Non says...
  • Mexico,

    You are truly a fool; I thought that it could not get any better than the time you said Tiffy's mom resembled the logo on the Denver Boncos helmets.

    To actually say she had two different types of cheeses in her underwear; that one also got me fired because I fell out on the floor and was laughing under my desk.

    I can't wait for Charm School to start for you to comment.

  • April 3, 2007 2:38 PM
  • LiLy says...
  • VH1 has an interview w/ tango regarding the comments hagzillas made about his mother, he says he forgives her BWAWHHAHAHAHAHHA
    WHAT a PUNK.
    so...big ole tan man tango really mustered up all his turtle powers for his big win. unbe-weavable!
    Ny chose a whiny, crippled, zit faced frumpy clothes wearing cheezy smiling, diamond CHIP engagement ring buying punk. happy snail trails to the both of you.
    from vh1:
    When you, New York and your mothers went out to lunch, New York was pretty disrespectful to your mother…

    (Laughs) To say the least. That was the first time that New York went too far for me. New York was saying things that I'd never say around my mom. But I just sort of sat back to let my mom take it in. My mom needs no defending whatsoever. She's a very strong woman. She knew what was going on. So I kept cool to let my mom see how New York really is, to see what she would possibly have to deal with. But at the same time, I saw a side of New York that I did not like. She knows that and she's apologized for it. She knows that that's something that just isn't going to work. I was appalled and disgusted by the comments New York and her mother made during the show that I only found out about after, when it aired. But she apologized for that, too. People make mistakes, so I'm cool with that. My mother works with families that need assistance and she deals with outrageous people on a regular basis. So what she saw was nothing. Plus, when I was a kid, she always taught me about sticks and stones, so that situation was reversed: if someone says something about you, big deal. Especially if it's not true.

    here's the whole interview http://vh1blog.vh1.com/2007/04/the_celebrealit.html

  • April 3, 2007 2:38 PM
  • Heroin says...
  • Good shit son. I never watch the show until after i read this shit. Dead funny son. I knew she was gonna pick the hero on the half-shell. Cause chance has "ignorant-ass series" written all over his man perm. Dude looked like sombody's thumb print from central bookings. VH-1 know's how to get their bread off of silly negroes so i expect to see his ass again before the year is over. Salute.

  • April 3, 2007 2:39 PM
  • Heroin says...
  • Good shit son. I never watch the show until after i read this shit. Dead funny son. I knew she was gonna pick the hero on the half-shell. Cause chance has "ignorant-ass series" written all over his man perm. Dude looked like sombody's thumb print from central bookings. VH-1 know's how to get their bread off of silly negroes so i expect to see his ass again before the year is over. Salute.

  • April 3, 2007 2:40 PM
  • Dominique says...
  • Spinoff series? Chance? Vh1 is gonna milk this as far as it goes...but I hope Tango's mom throws some hot fish grease on New York when she hears what she said about her. And New York's daddy...oh excuse me "SISTER" PATTERSON need not wear anything with tassels and a cow print.

  • April 3, 2007 2:41 PM
  • BigReg79 says...
  • Ron,
    I KNOW you've read the new issue of King with New York in there. She said the winner was packing like 2 inches...PLEASE tell me you've seen this! Tango really need to re-think his options before he show up on the "I'mma flirt re-remix" with all those other pussy whipped dudes u mentioned last wk.

  • April 3, 2007 2:54 PM
  • Lowedwn says...
  • O man o man, the last 15 minutes of this shit made the whole season worthwhile. Chance whipping out the swisher before he even stepped out the door was str8 classic. My girl was like I think he really liked her, I know he really liked her 'cause niggaz only get like that when they all butt-hurt and they feelings done been crushed...Fuck that two-way ass bitch, yo...I'll never forget yo ass.

    Yo I almost died when Tango came out looking like a peppermint-candy cane pimp. Themn when that fool had the audacity to propose, I almost had the heart attack I know his moms had. Yo I know y'all saw the look on her face, like damn I knew I fucked up and should'a picked Chance.

    Man...this fucking show...I actually watched it twice last night

    Aye, and is it me or did manBearpig look like she wanted Chance to tongue her devil ass down before he left.

  • April 3, 2007 2:56 PM
  • Lowedwn says...
  • all my real niggaz i would announce that the show Monique hosting "Charm School" is filled wit enough T&A for a softcore porn flick.


    Posted by: Sinistah aka Sin Piff at April 3, 2007 2:29 PM
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    Oh I feel you on that...Bootz's ass is BACK y'all, mmmmmmmm mmmm bitches

  • April 3, 2007 2:57 PM
  • mika says...
  • man, I've been waiting all day for this! I don't know where to begin with that mess. Chance and that conk with the fancy parts in it, and greased up. That is one IGNAT NIGRA, that's for sure. The dolphins weren't just dolphins, they was part shark too, cause that wasn't no dolphin dat jumped out da water. IGNAT NIGRA couldn't even fake it. His tirade at the end was the best.
    Wango, Wango, Wango... did he really propose to that furry eyelash wearing broad? To quote Flav: Damn son! I guess I'll have to watch the reunion special to see if she really is engaged. LAWD HAFF MERCY! I wouldn't be suprised to see a spin off show of their "engagement". Damn I wish I owned stock with the parent company of VH1...

  • April 3, 2007 3:06 PM
  • lemaracqt7 says...
  • LOL I knew it I knew it! See i called it from jump, it's Tango....

    I will miss you clownin this show and the ManBearPigs.....

  • April 3, 2007 3:08 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • OMG! OMG! SO FUNNY! I can't take Son!

    WHAT UP SIN?!?!

    Okay, to say that I was like a crack head waiting to get my next fix allllllllll day yesterday waiting for this finale is an understatement. And it delivered on EVERY level. Not to mention my Methadone withdrawls waiting to read what Ron Mexico was gonna say. MAN! So good... does life get any better?

    ONE of my favorite parts of lasts nights festivities, was when Tango AKA Tan Man AKA I-forgive-WAY-too-much-stuff-my-woman-does-and-says went FLIP MODE SQUAD on Chance AKA Eddie Murphy Jr. AKA Grease 3.

    When he clenched up his jaw and said, I swear, Imma break ya in two son!" hahahaha HE MEANT THAT ISH! The only thing that made it better was when he said, "This is Bedrock Son!" and then threw up his "T". OMG ON THE FLOOR! hahahahaha... wheeeew, Good times!

    Anyway, Imma miss this blog every week. But Im sure Charm School will far outweigh this one, although I don't know how. I can't wait for Chance's spin off... cuz ya know he's gonna get one. At least he should. I feel like I'm losing my best friend... DONT LEAVE ME! hahahahaha

    Well, back to stalking Whiteboy on My Space. GET AT ME SIN!

    Steph Luva-Luva

  • April 3, 2007 3:09 PM
  • Ron Mexico says...
  • Dude looked like sombody's thumb print from central bookings.

    Heroin... I don't know how many points that's worth! Amazing!

    Sin... Steph is trynna holler, son? I know you ain't gonna leave homegirl hangin like that.

    ---------------------
    LOL I knew it I knew it! See i called it from jump, it's Tango....

    I will miss you clownin this show and the ManBearPigs.....

    Posted by: lemaracqt7 at April 3, 2007 3:08 PM

    I had Wango all the way from episode 1.

  • April 3, 2007 3:23 PM
  • c b w says...
  • Chance, hands down has to win the Reality Show Personality Award of the Year. This cat and his niggerish ways have done nothing but made me laugh out loud at this otherwise televised race to see what disease this chick was going to give to whom from Flav.

    This dude said he was going to light a blunt! The only thing that would've made that scene of him leaving better would've been if he gave Sistah Shim Patterson the Heisman on his way to the limo. Plus that dude should be called Dr. Doolittle. He missed his calling with animals...then again...he did his best with New York.

    When she changed into her Sistah's Secrets, the only thing I could imagine is that she made the room smell like Kools and ass.

    Tango was dressed like A Pimp Named Sweetback sold him his shit up from the Harlem Nights Haberdashery. All that nigga was missing was a tommy gun.

  • April 3, 2007 3:44 PM
  • lil\'twin says...
  • Tango Played The Game Very Well, He Knew N.Y. Was Feeling Chance. And That Women Like Flashy Things, And That Chance Was Exciting. Tango Was Intimidated By Chance, Not Physically But By Chances Demeanor. That Is Apparent By Tangos Change Of Style Later In The Series- Notice How Tango Starts Giving His Hat A Ridiculous Amount Of Tilt On His Head, Trying To Appear To Have More Swagger. Even On The Last Episode Note That He Wore His Hat With A Normal Tilt Then Once He Got Out The Limo And Saw Chance- All Of A Sudden His Hat Is Hanging Over His Ear. Lmao, New York Had To Decide Of Between A Chance/New York Spin Off Or A Tango/New York. The Producers And Her Mom Maybe Influenced Her That Tango Was A Better Choice. Anyway That\'s My Two Cents....and Oh Chance Was Funny As Heck When He Told Sister Patterson She Looked Like The Devil In That Red Suit. Chance Should\'ve Took The Money. Mr. Mexico You Are My Favorite Blog Writer, Keep Up The Great Work. I Have All My Family In West Virginia Reading Your Blog.

  • April 3, 2007 4:02 PM
  • Steph Luva Luva says...
  • Ron Mexico, don't be startin no ish NOOKA! hahahahaha... aint nobody tryin to holla at Sin! That's just my boy... plus, I dont' think he could handle all this deliciousness LOL

  • April 3, 2007 4:12 PM
  • lil\'twin says...
  • And I Do Believe That New York Knew About Tangos Plan Somewhat. It Wasn\'t His Money That Bought That Ring. After He Convinced People On The Show That He Loved New York, Things Swinged His Way. Especially When She Was Tipped About A Suprise From Tango If She Chose Him. Yep, Thats How Reality TV Works Sometimes. This Of Course Is All Speculation On My Part, But That\'s How I Read Last Nights Episode. And Why Didn\'t Anyone Comment On Those Crazy Mr. Ed Horse Faces She Was Making, While Pretending To Be Surprised After Tangos Proposal? It Was Horribile, But I Still Kinda Sorta Like New York, When She\'s Not Acting.

  • April 3, 2007 4:17 PM
  • Bird says...
  • LAWD JESUS!!! Why did I read these damn comments. Yall gonna get me fired or committed or something. Nah, cause if somebody in the office says anything I'ma just tell them to read this ish.

    First of all I finally looked up the Denver Broncos logo a minute ago and been cryin every since. Each of the following statements along the way reignited my hysteria and I'm hoping I have a job tomorrow.

    Dude looked like sombody's thumb print from central bookings.

    ...diamond CHIP engagement ring buying punk.

    Chance and that conk with the fancy parts in it, and greased up.

    The only thing that made it better was when he said, "This is Bedrock Son!" and then threw up his "T".

    Man, I ain't messin with yall no more.

  • April 3, 2007 4:27 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • *Riskin my job typin back*

    That ish is true huh, Bird???? That mess was funny! "This is Bedrock Son! *Thowin up da T*. OMG I was rollin... i was like I don't know NOBODY GROWN who does that... at least nobody in my click. I love Tango though hahahaha thats my boy!

  • April 3, 2007 4:50 PM
  • mika says...
  • The hands down best comment:
    "When she changed into her Sistah's Secrets, the only thing I could imagine is that she made the room smell like Kools and ass. "
    Woooooooowwwwwww!!!!!

  • April 3, 2007 4:55 PM
  • mika says...
  • Hands down best comment:
    "When she changed into her Sistah's Secrets, the only thing I could imagine is that she made the room smell like Kools and ass."
    Wooooowwwwww!!!!!

  • April 3, 2007 4:57 PM
  • Bird says...
  • Hands down best comment:
    "When she changed into her Sistah's Secrets, the only thing I could imagine is that she made the room smell like Kools and ass."
    Wooooowwwwww!!!!!

    Posted by: mika at April 3, 2007 4:57 PM


    I wanted to add that one, but didn't because on the real I woul wear that first Sista Secret get up she had on.
    That was hott.

  • April 3, 2007 5:12 PM
  • GUTTA says...
  • I CANT WAIT FOR SEASON 2,YALL KNOW THAT TANGO AND NEWYORK WON'T LAST VERY LONG

  • April 3, 2007 5:16 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • Man, I'll be surprised if they're still together by the reunion next weekend! According to Tango, they're still very much together and very much in love. He said they're trying to make it work communicating via phone, text, & e-mails. I don't know... I think he's way too good for her. I mean, I love watching the disaster that is Tiffany Pollard but in "real life" she's better off with Chance's retarded ass!

  • April 3, 2007 5:24 PM
  • kitty says...
  • O man o man, the last 15 minutes of this shit made the whole season worthwhile. Chance whipping out the swisher before he even stepped out the door was str8 classic. My girl was like I think he really liked her, I know he really liked her 'cause niggaz only get like that when they all butt-hurt and they feelings done been crushed...Fuck that two-way ass bitch, yo...I'll never forget yo ass.

    Yo I almost died when Tango came out looking like a peppermint-candy cane pimp. Themn when that fool had the audacity to propose, I almost had the heart attack I know his moms had. Yo I know y'all saw the look on her face, like damn I knew I fucked up and should'a picked Chance.

    Man...this fucking show...I actually watched it twice last night

    Aye, and is it me or did manBearpig look like she wanted Chance to tongue her devil ass down before he left.

    ^^^^^^
    OMG you have me cddddddddddddddddfu.

  • April 3, 2007 5:47 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • Okay... I know it's bordering on OCD, but I had to add this one cuz I rewound it on my TiVo like 50 times last night:

    "F*** him and his back-stabbin', big fat mouth, blabber ass, Ninja Turtle-lookin', motherf***in' yezzir-talkin, syrup-sippin' motherf***in' ass."

    HEEEE-LARRRY-US LMAO!

  • April 3, 2007 6:08 PM
  • Sin aka Sin Piff says...
  • Steph, Ron, ya'll both returded, lmaooo

    yo this shit is the end of somethin epic, i swear i aint watch this show or that white rapper show til this blog, lmaooo whats next????

  • April 3, 2007 6:26 PM
  • Agape APBT Kennels says...
  • Steph, you's a FOOL! But my favorite thing I"ve heard from a blog so far has to be this one: Chance's hair looked like someone wrapped it in marbelized lunch meat. now thats funny son

  • April 3, 2007 6:27 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • I know right Sin?? I feel like my best friend bounced on me! I can't wait till they sell this madness on DVD so I can watch the un-edited version of the freak scenes LMAO! Well, I'm hopin that Ron keeps it funky for The Charmed School so I have something to read on Tuesdays!

  • April 3, 2007 6:30 PM
  • jong says...
  • Tango was dressed like A Pimp Named Sweetback sold him his shit up from the Harlem Nights Haberdashery. All that nigga was missing was a tommy gun.

    Posted by: c b w at April 3, 2007 3:44 PM
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! damn im rollin. yall niggaz is killin me

  • April 3, 2007 6:46 PM
  • King of Klubz says...
  • Been looking forward to this post all day. I have a few things to address about the show, particularly last night.

    1. Chance definitely showed his gayness last night. If he wasn't holding on to his clutch, the gel caked in his hair definitely gave it way.

    2. If New York is really wearing real fur eyelashes, why in the hell is she wear synthetic hair(and bad hair at that)?

    3. Tango is really going to beat the brakes of Tiffany after the comments she made about his mom.

    4. If Chance has a reality show after this, who is going to watch it?

  • April 3, 2007 6:48 PM
  • whit says...
  • My thing was, why the hell was Tango smiling so hard after his mating dance with New York. That nig look like he ain't get none in a minute. She look a hot mess in the morning.

    New York and Chance act just alike. They can't say words correctly and they make up phrases. But two strong personalities shouldn't be together, but it would be funny to watch on their own show.

    Damn. Chance ain’t never been nowhere. You can tell! This nigga jumpin around like Richard Pryor at every little thing. “Oh shit! A butterfly! Ahh! Dragon! Get me out this crazy place, dammit!” I wanna see footage of Real taking him to the zoo.

    LMAO!!!This was the highlight of this post for me. Chance is stupid for calling the Dolphins, Water Dogs....hot mess. Coonery at its finest.

  • April 3, 2007 6:59 PM
  • G. e. Z says...
  • That show was funny as hell but you cant front it was CHANCE that made the shit entertaining! That nigga remind me of eddie murphey back in the day!

    And Tango, damn thats a herb if i ever seen one for real! a straight snitching cornball...and he got on his knee for the chick! haaaaaaaaaaaaaa!Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!Bwwwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!


    I tell you what VH1 give Chance a show called "One More Chance" and watch the ratings fly! that dude got natural talent..or pair him upp with Mr.Boston and send em on a road trip from Boston to Cali making various stops...This Odd couple will make a show worth watching for sure!

    but that shit last night was the funniest! better than Flava of love.

  • April 3, 2007 8:09 PM
  • Kadence says...
  • Lmao @ all the above comments. Ya'll wildin'. I normally read and not post but ya'll got me crackin' up over here with some of the ish ya'll sayin'.

    “Gimme a hug. Bitch, please! Man, I ain’t huggin’ yo’ ass! I already done slapped yo ass… Shook yo ass… Tapped that ass… Man, get yo ass up outta here.”

    ^^^^^^^Man, Chance sayin' that ish was classic. Str8 classic, yo!

  • April 3, 2007 8:44 PM
  • just rollin'! says...
  • This is the first recap I have read from this blog and hell if it ain't the funniest thing I have read in EVER time!!! The comments are bout as off the chain as the blog itself!! I'm still trying to catch my breath-- bear with me now....

  • April 3, 2007 9:11 PM
  • sexxy says...
  • ahahahahaha lol who ever made the comment about chance hairstyle makes him look like a hoe ahahahaha that shit was sure fuuuuny...but to be honest i think chance was puttin on the whole entire time cuz to me he didnt seem like he was feeling newyork at all...that shit was funny when he said newyork is a strait up two way hoe....and her momma look like the devil in a red dress ahahahahahahaqhahaha..ooooooh shit...lol..at least chance gay looking ass didnt go out like no punk....after the reuion i hope tango dis her ass...4 real..for talking about his mom like that..after watching this whole show i had to ask myself ...did alex (newyorks dad and ms patterson(newyorks mom )SEPERATED?? ..BECAUSE U WOULD THINK THAT AFTER MEETING THE MOMS THEY WOULD WANT THE DADS APPROVAL AS WELL...I DONT BLAME HIM TO STAY FAR AWAY FROM THEM TWO BIPOLAR BITCHES 4 GOOD ...ESPECIALLY AFTER FLIRTING WITH KRAZYS MOM AND GRAND MOM ALALALALALALALAL,,,,,NEWYORKS NEW TITTIES IMPLANT LOOK SO NASTY ON TV..SHE CANT KEEP THEM OFF HER LAP... OH SHIT LOL

  • April 3, 2007 9:49 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • Yeah Sexxxy, ManBearPig and Mr. ManBearPig got a divorce. Rumor is that they're talkin about giving ManBearPig her own show so she can find a new dude... Im not sure if I could stomach that one... but I'd dayum sure try!

  • April 3, 2007 10:01 PM
  • CROOK says...

  • "them dolphins like water dogs"


    hahahahahahaha


  • April 3, 2007 11:37 PM
  • crook says...
  • for real, i am dying laughing right now at the comments .. denver broncos ahahahaha

    Tango was dressed like A Pimp Named Sweetback sold him his shit up from the Harlem Nights Haberdashery. All that nigga was missing was a tommy gun.

    The only thing that would've made that scene of him leaving better would've been if he gave Sistah Shim Patterson the Heisman on his way to the limo. Plus that dude should be called Dr. Doolittle. He missed his calling with animals...then again...he did his best with New York.


    bhahahahaha

  • April 3, 2007 11:43 PM
  • kit says...
  • ok here goes..........
    i dont blame chance for goin off on wango. wango talked a lotta chit behind peoples backs. if he wanted to he could have got to chance but once again he failed to call upon his turtle powers and hid behind the camera dude. im glad she confronted him, i wish chance would have bum rushed him tho, hung onto his neck and beat him about his shell. chance had me rollin, fighting w/ those banana trees. i heard tango is packing a 2 incher, well check out this gif HAHAH chance was packin fo sho


    http://vh1.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/chance_verygood.gif

  • April 4, 2007 1:14 AM
  • Tony says...
  • The only thing that would've made that scene of him leaving better would've been if he gave Sistah Shim Patterson the Heisman on his way to the limo.
    ---------------------------------------If that would've happened, I would have literally died from laughter! LMAO!!!

  • April 4, 2007 1:26 AM
  • get$ mOnEy$$$ says...
  • who said they needa get a show wit Mr. Boston n Chance is true them 2 dudes made the show worth watchin ....Boston be cuttin up too much

  • April 4, 2007 8:47 AM
  • Lis says...
  • Well, now that the show's over, I've had a chance to see both Stallionaires and "Tan Man" Tango's websites. I hate to say it, but Tango actually has something DECENT, compared to that stuff the brothers put out, which I found was crap, but Real takes really nice pictures! :)

  • April 4, 2007 8:52 AM
  • Keema says...

  • Hey Ron –

    Couldn’t wait for your post!!

    Anyway Chance hair had to go!! Is that some West Coast sh^t? The rapper Rass Kass has that same ole tired hair style!! You know them cats use to rock a curl, so anything is possible!!

    Dude doesn’t even have any kind of waves under that doo-rag! I mean he wore a doo-rag the entire time of the show and he finally decide to remove that nasty doo-rag. Then his bitch ass use more hair gel then a chick from Baltimore, and if anyone ever been to Maryland u do know those chick have like 14 hairstyles’ with tons of hair gel!!

    Also what made them cats were them old ass Master P suits? I could so see Bishop Don Quan in the back room yelling church!

    I so glad the train-wreck is done, for some reason I was so sick of seeing these people kiss each other all the time!! That sh^t gross me out !

  • April 4, 2007 9:17 AM
  • Eli says...
  • Chance is so gross; his hair looked like a grease slick that someone ran their fingers through to make some streaks. I hope to God that this doesn't mean Chance will get a spinoff to find love, because that is one minstrel show I do not intend to watch. I'm an admitted viewer of the train wrecks of Flavor of Love I & II, and I Love New York, but I can't stand to watch Chance's ass one more second. It will be hard to get through the Reunion with him being there. I would hope he doesn't show up, but I am sure he will be their to continue promoting the "Stallionaire's" (more like the horse's asses).

  • April 4, 2007 9:54 AM
  • EReal says...
  • Bravo man, the comments you've had on this series are fuckin classic. You had me rollin every damn post.

    I cant wait for the reunion episode and the charm school commentary, lmfao.

    Those sluts are gonna be funny as hell.

    1 hunned.

  • April 4, 2007 9:59 AM
  • tiptoe says...
  • BUMPY JOHNSON!!!!!!! LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

  • April 4, 2007 12:33 PM
  • mika says...
  • "Then his bitch ass use more hair gel then a chick from Baltimore"....
    LMAO!!! I CANNOT TAKE IT!!! Dumb NIGRA didn't even use the black people gel (ladies back east you know what I'm talking about. The black gel that will actually change the color of your hair if you don't wash it the hell out) he used some old school Dippity Do on that greasy nasty mess. Did anybody have the same thought I did when he was standing in his swim trunks with no shirt... "DAY-YAM NIGGA EAT A SAMMICH!!!" That trick NY was on some local morning show in New York talking about how she's not ready for marriage.... and her father is a MINISTER. I always heard preacher's kids are the worst but SHEET!!!

  • April 4, 2007 12:42 PM
  • c b w says...
  • ".... and her father is a MINISTER. I always heard preacher's kids are the worst but SHEET!!!"

    Posted by: mika at April 4, 2007 12:42 PM

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    After living with those 2 rottencrotch-boxcar bitches, he had no choice but to turn to God. He was living in Hell so he had nowhere to go but up. That fire red suit Shim Patterson was wearing was the smoking gun.

  • April 4, 2007 1:21 PM
  • Steph Luva-Luva says...
  • LMAO hahahahaha OMG so funny! These new comments have me dying... good times! Ummm, is it REALLY true that New York said in King magazine that the winner has a little snausage? Is that true??? PLEASE say it ain't so!

  • April 4, 2007 1:28 PM
  • New_Skool says...
  • I'm late but this shit is funny:

    After living with those 2 rottencrotch-boxcar bitches, he had no choice but to turn to God. He was living in Hell so he had nowhere to go but up. That fire red suit Shim Patterson was wearing was the smoking gun.


    Posted by: c b w at April 4, 2007 1:21 PM

    Lmao, it's a wrap. Fuck Tango for marrying that ho. It's straight to the clinic for that nigga.

  • April 5, 2007 1:27 AM
  • c b w says...
  • I just realized who NY looks liike...She looks like the only female who played in the band on the Muppet Show.

    I feel bad for insulting the muppet. Ain't that some shit.

  • April 5, 2007 2:20 PM
  • Ron Mexico says...
  • c b... that's janice. yes. definitely. everyone's coming to that realization slowly.

  • April 7, 2007 1:18 AM
  • MS CARTER says...
  • love what you said but for you and the ones who do not know tango is far more than he showed he has his own record company and he has that money did you hear when his ex girl friend said he worked too hard will he put his music and artists before her go look him up

  • April 7, 2007 2:04 AM
  • nupe says...
  • After living with those 2 rottencrotch-boxcar bitches, he had no choice but to turn to God. He was living in Hell so he had nowhere to go but up. That fire red suit Shim Patterson was wearing was the smoking gun.

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Sweet Jesus! This did me in right'chea. Whew...

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLMMFAO!!!

  • April 7, 2007 2:34 AM
  • Bootsy Collins says...
  • Chance's hair looked like burnt plastic

  • April 7, 2007 2:43 AM
  • shirleywine says...
  • hey chance i say the hell with new york how about the Will you give me a Chance Show

  • April 7, 2007 9:22 AM
  • shirleywine says...
  • how about keeping the reality shows moving i would love to be a contestant in The give me a Chance Show.hey by the way Chance baby tiffany (they love new) will be next to me Ha Ha Ha!!!!!!!!

  • April 7, 2007 9:49 AM
  • sexxy says...
  • ms pattersen should be ashamed of herself for trying to divorce her husband just to be on her daughters show.....i think ms pattersen is gay talking about she all for gaypride and she with the program....ahahahaha...hmmm...newyork whorin ass needs to shut her funky ass up ,,,the ugly finger suckin dick suckin big lip bitch is ghetto and nasty. she can talk about tangos ass all she wants but she knows tango gonna leave her ass the minute someone else steps up to the plate...he doesnt really want newyork....

  • April 7, 2007 12:28 PM
  • ghettobabii says...
  • i think dat chance is fineee as hell, new york is stupid fo not pickin chance
    Chance holla at a girl from the 312

  • April 8, 2007 10:55 AM
  • Loving says...
  • NY is a whore. Let's just put it out there. How is she going to dleep w/ 2 men in a 24 hr interval. AND I can't understand why she didn't take that ring and run with it... Its not like she's getting marriage offers on a daily basis. I couldn' stop laughing NY is ignorant and tries so hard to pretend like she's not. This was some great entertainment... I could veg out and thank God that he gave me some common sense. This was better than Flavor of Love, when she got bounced (TWICE) after giving up the goodies. When will females learn that sleeping w/someone doesn't build a relationship. VH1 had me doubled over in laughter over this show.

  • April 8, 2007 5:43 PM
  • Cheyrose says...
  • Sister Patterson says shes christian and loves the lord.I say shes full of it. She believes in the gay party and uses swear words. I mean, come on!

  • April 8, 2007 8:13 PM
  • kekes gurl says...
  • well my opinion on the show was you either love new york or hate her!!!! Chance was the better man for and Tango was nothing but a weak-ninja turtle-looking motherf*****!!!! Chance and NY was made for one another and it is sad to say that she lead him cause honestly i think that he really started to develop true feelings for her!!! Well Chance should get a show cause he was real entertaining(Take a Chance)
    Well if chance ever wanted to get wit a real woman he should get wit me!!!

  • April 8, 2007 9:08 PM
  • sexxy says...
  • to be honest i cant see how anybody thinks chance is the better man for newyork...shes corrupt as it is already.i mean lets be honest what can chance offer her??nothing...hes broke,hes disrespectful to woman,he stays in trouble,and the nigga refuse to step inside of a church for god sake..chance will have both his ass and hers in jail plus hes a punk...tango is a gentle men who acts like an adult and have respect for woman..hes not a ninja turtle cuz hes not slow ...chance look gay as hell and look like hes on crack...ill roll with tango and marry that nigga myself.newyork is a nasty whore just for tv

  • April 9, 2007 7:34 AM
  • Simret says...
  • You had me laughing out loud in a computer lab. Thanks, now everyone thinks I'm nuts..

  • April 10, 2007 5:21 PM
  • Estrella says...
  • These comments have me cracking up.... I know that I'm late, but I agree with lil 'twin....NY MUST'VE known before the final elimination about the planned proposal by Tango. The VH1 producers probably were behind the whole proposal b/c I doubt that Tango had money like that to buy the ring himself, just like I'm sure that Sister Patterson didn't have 10 G's to offer Chance to leave NY on the previous show. Makes you wonder! It made no sense for her to pick Tango, especially after she was feeling Chance the whole time.

  • April 12, 2007 12:12 AM
  • Estrella says...
  • BTW, does anyone know Chance's real name or his myspace URL?? Even though he's skinny as hell, he's still a fine ass man. He cleans up well.

  • April 12, 2007 12:17 AM
  • Itsmeagain says...
  • LMAO!!!!!!!!!! Oh god! "Stankin ass green T-shirt"...Ron Mexico is a fool!!! Im sitting in class laughing and the sub is looking at me like I belong on the short-bus!

  • April 12, 2007 3:46 PM
  • Jasmine says...
  • I think tiffany should pick chance and he sayed their after tiffany mother was going to give him money to go back home and he said no to the money and she still didn't pick him he can went home with some money but he went home just with a broken heart i was said 4 him.

  • April 12, 2007 8:18 PM
  • celesta says...
  • TANGO AND TIFFANY ARE ON LONGER TOGETHER WATCH THE REUNION SHOW. CHANCE IS SEXY AS HELL. YOU ARE JEALOUS OF CHANCE WILL HIS FINE ASS. TANGO UGLY ASS PLAYED THE DUMB BITCH JUST LIKE FLAV. CHANCE HAIR LOOK LIKE IT WAS SUPPOSE AND HE WAS SO SEXY AND FINE. HIS HAIR LOOK LIKE SOME FINGER PRINTS. COUNTRY ASS PEOPLE SHOULD STAY OFF OF BLOGS UNTIL YOU COME TO THE CITY. CHANCE IS THE MAN ALL WOMEN WANT AND HE SURPISE ME WHEN HE CAME OUT DRESS AND GQ DOWN. DUMB ASS PEOPLE STAY AWAY FROM THE BLOGS UNTIL YOU KNOW SOMETJING ABOUT THE REAL WORLD. TANGO WEAR THE SAME SHIT HE BROUGTH WITH HIM. CHANCE BROUGHT THOSE 12 SUITS ON VH1 AND THAT DUMB HOE BROUGHT CHANCE REAL DIAMOND EARRINGS WHILE TANGO WORE FAKE. HE BROUGHT RING BY VH1 AND A WATCH BUT THEYRE NOT TOGETHER ANYMORE. ITS ALL ON THE INTERNET NEW YORK SAID ON KING THAT TANGO HAS A LITTLE DICK. SPEAK WHAT YOU KNOW AND NOT WHAT YOU THINK.

  • April 15, 2007 7:21 AM
  • Kamilah says...
  • i love chance and u aint need new york wit yo sexy ass u can get any girl u want but i really think that you should of took the money but it's cool u know and i don't like that fat nigga tango that nigga is ugly as ever but she wasn't even cute enough 4 u find u somebody else and i got real mad when new york ma ma caped on talking about you i was geting to heated but i just want u to know that u don't need hear and that she was never good enough 4 you and i think you should have your own tv show juct something 2 think about i love you cahnce boo.

  • April 15, 2007 8:31 PM
  • kamilah says...
  • chance u is so sexy ii hope you beat tango fat ass you and ur brother and white boy and fuck new york wit her ugly self and her ma ma wither big 4 head ass

  • April 15, 2007 8:38 PM
  • Shomonique says...
  • I think New York {AKA} {Tiffany} should pick Chace because He's quit fan and he loves New York to much.

  • April 15, 2007 10:55 PM
  • sexxy says...
  • you all are some young dumb bitches that need a fuckin spell check before u write shit on here ..look hoe im from the city ..u lil niggas think chance is cute ...psssst please that nigga audition to be on the show started out with a fukkin mohawk and a gappy tooth..look like a spring chickin...hes ignorant,disrespectful,hes bipolar,crackhead,a lil punk cryin over dumb shit,and gay...you lil young bitches that dont know shit always lookin on the outside of a nigga instead of the inside..which is why i say tango was there for all the right reason...and im glad he dropped that ugly bitch two time raggedy big lip hoe ..hes too good for her ...so check yourself dumb bitches ...my oppinion.

  • April 16, 2007 12:13 AM
  • TYEASHA says...
  • BITCH CHANCE SHOULD OF ONE

  • April 16, 2007 12:24 AM
  • matthew says...
  • tango is a pay back u bitch.

  • April 16, 2007 12:25 AM
  • sexxy says...
  • she didnt want chance she just wanted to fuck him didnt want to let his ass go cuz she wanted his skinny dick BITCHES...and the thing with ms patterson brivin chance to leave.. that shit was prolly a set up by both newyork and her mom but she couldnt get rid of his ass so she let him stay and pretend she wasnt in on it...remember hoes this is vh1 pulling the strings...tango won and he deserved to win but not for that slut who prolly slept her way to get that reality show...like chance said newyork has been around with so many men shes a whore a bigtime whore..he didnt want that shit from the get go.....so write what u know u lil hoe ass bitches that dont know shit ...stay the fuck off this blog if ur ass cant spell....by the way i was so glad that he pulled that shit off on national tv dumping her ass watching tears rolled down her ugly face...any man in their right mind would not stay with an ugly bitch talking about their momma on tv and his ass..besides his dick aint small she said that shit cuz he didnt get hard for her nasty infested ass...enuff said

  • April 16, 2007 8:54 AM
  • shatara says...
  • I AGREE WITH SEXXY!CHANCE IS TOO IMMATURE.TANGO WAS THERE FOR ALL THE RIGHT REASONS BUT NEWYORK DOGGED HIM OUT AND WANTED TO SLEEP WITH EVERY NIGGA ON THAT SHOW.CHANCE WAS GONNA DUMP HER AT THE END TOO IF HE WAS PICKED.HE DID FIND OUT THAT SHE IS A BIG TYME WHORE..HE SAID SO HIMSELF!

  • April 16, 2007 9:12 AM
  • Tanesha says...
  • Dang did yall see the reunion? Tango played New York at the end! lol She should've known that he wasn't going to stick around once he seen what she said about his mother. I wonder what is taking Tango so long to get a facial? It's been like four months and he still looks the same...I think that Chance still got feelings for her so who knows, they might have their own show together.

  • April 16, 2007 9:20 AM
  • andrea says...
  • i hate how tango tries to act tough by crouching and grabbing his crotch or pants like an idiot.

  • April 16, 2007 12:23 PM
  • Jessica says...
  • Well, that shit is messed up. i think New York should of picked chance but i guess she got what she deserved cuz she lost eveything. She needs 2 learn when to keep her mouth shut but i still feel bad for her.

  • April 16, 2007 2:59 PM
  • b-block says...
  • yoooo new york is soo sexy
    and tango iz rong 4 doin that to new york

  • April 16, 2007 3:28 PM
  • tiana says...
  • New York you the crazyest bitch ever.

  • April 16, 2007 8:46 PM
  • keyla says...
  • New York is ugly azz hell and Chance desevered better so im glad he didnt win and Tango look like a monkey from the zoo or some where and Real look to sexci wit his hair braided

  • April 18, 2007 5:09 PM
  • Patty says...
  • That was the funniest commemtary, I have read in a long while. I almost came all over myself after laughing so hard. I would love to meet and stay in touch with the writer.

  • April 18, 2007 8:17 PM
  • Patty says...
  • That was the funniest commemtary, I have read in a long while. I almost came all over myself after laughing so hard. I would love to meet and stay in touch with the writer.

  • April 18, 2007 8:18 PM
  • lulu says...
  • how can i meet chance

  • April 19, 2007 11:46 AM
  • Keena says...
  • wtf u mean?!? Chance is sexy && iloved what he did to his hair why all yall niggaz hating on my baby...As for NY Or Tiffany what is up with what punkin Said about you tryin to eat her pussy?? Wtf lemme find out U dykin..lmao...I am But i swear Bitch is dum for not pickin Chance...Chance is Hubby material he's the whole package Unlike the ninja Turtle look ass nigga Wango... But how bout this crazy psyycho bitch stll didnt find love... haha maybe loves not for u cause ur so fuckin fake bitch fake as press on nails....LOL

  • April 20, 2007 2:50 PM
  • shapula says...
  • new york you is a bitch you left 3 times in a row and that dress was ugly you looked a hot mess bitch and yo momma looked ugly then what she looked when she was on the show

  • April 23, 2007 11:12 AM
  • latoya says...
  • why you didnt pick chance you a dumb hoe you so ugly i cant see straight everthing on you is not real talking about tango momma you dont have a place to talk about inybody you need to get rolled in to the ugly basket

  • April 23, 2007 11:17 AM
  • shapaula says...
  • tango i hope you read this you is fake you aint know 100 percent real nigga like chance,whiteboy,and real

  • April 23, 2007 11:57 AM
  • shapaula says...
  • tango i hope you read this you is fake you aint know 100 percent real nigga like chance,whiteboy,and real

  • April 23, 2007 11:58 AM
  • michlle says...
  • iiiiiiiiiiiiiii LLOOOOOOOOOVE NNNEEEWWWWWWW YYYYOORRRRRRRKKKKK THE SHOW AND YOU SHOULD OF PICKED CHANCE

  • April 24, 2007 11:38 AM
  • Dale says...
  • FUCK TANGO BECAUSE HE DID MY NIGGA NEWYORK LIKE DAT AND CHANCE WHEN HE CALLED U OUT U WHITE BOY AND REAL SHOULD HAVE WE ON STAGE AND BEAT HE NINGA TURTLE ASS

  • April 25, 2007 12:21 PM
  • HANNAH says...
  • THAT CRASZI CHANCE SHOULD WIN

  • April 25, 2007 9:07 PM
  • Tango Tells All says...
  • Tango tells all in an exclusive podcast interview on 4/23/2007. What was real, what wasn't and does he really have love for NEW YORK? Find out for yourself at http://www.blackpressmagazine.com

  • April 25, 2007 10:54 PM
  • jodi says...
  • you should have pick chance cause he is fucking cute as hell and tango looks like a fucking turtle

  • April 27, 2007 12:21 PM
  • Tango Tells All says...
  • TANGO of "I Love New York" breaks his silence

    Hey, have you listened to TANGO of "I Love New York" as he kisses and tells in his first interview since the show...an exclusive podcast interview at BlackPressRadio.com?

    He told EVERYTHING: what was real, what wasn't and if he really had love for New York.

    Check it out!
    http://www.blackpressradio.com

    P.S. I'm interviewing Deelishis soon!

    -Peace...DC Livers
    Black Press Magazine

  • April 28, 2007 10:35 PM
  • jazz says...
  • O my god chance is so cute and new york knew she should of picked chance.But nonal she just being dumb listing to her ugly ass mama.And for the info her mama liked real thats why she sent him home because she knew deep down inside her mama liked real.

  • April 29, 2007 5:26 PM
  • tiara says...
  • damn dat was funny as hell chance will always b mi boo new york was bitch to let him go.

  • May 11, 2007 1:35 PM
  • shavon parker- jones says...
  • you know wat you the bitch cuz i bet you wont talk that shit in his face you just mad that chance is sexii ass hell and he made it on i love new york and you didnt so you need to shut yo two inch dick having self ^

  • May 17, 2007 6:26 PM
  • allure searles says...
  • i think that new york should of picked Chance because she knew damn well that chance was a good person to be with so new york think twice and when chance stars on the 2nd season of i love new york u need to pic him next time really think it over about who u want to be with.

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  • February 3, 2008 10:29 PM
  • HsvsRsvsesv says...
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  • February 19, 2008 4:06 AM
  • benicar says...
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  • February 21, 2008 10:56 PM
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  • lostyand says...

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  • alliance says...

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  • alliance says...

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  • sweeta-yt says...
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  • sweeta-yt says...
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  • May 22, 2008 4:08 AM

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