April 2007 Archives

SOHH.com’s Talkin’ Videos is giving you a chance to WIN THE DVD -- CODENAME: The Cleaner Starring Cedric The Entertainer in stores now!

Jake, a mild-mannered janitor, gets in over his head when he is duped into believing that he is an undercover agent who subconsciously holds a key piece of information that could expose an arms conspiracy involving the CIA and FBI. Lucy Liu (Domino, Charlie’s Angels) and Nicollette Sheridan (TV’s Desperate Housewives) co-star as the women Jake may or may not be entangled with romantically. Rated PG-13 for sexual content, crude humor and some violence.

The DVD includes the hilarious making-of featurette, “Moppin' Up with the Cleaning Crew” and film outtakes.

To enter, send an email to talkinvideos@sohh.com with the subject: Codename DVD Giveaway before Friday, May 4th. We’ll select 10 lucky winners from the submissions. Must by 18 or older to enter!

Yesterday's installment of "Charm School" made a bigger mockery of our contestants than usual. Knowing damn well that more than half of these girls have some type of modeling aspirations or experience, Mo'prah, Simon and Horsey make these girls "model" wears that they fashion themselves with various household materials.

Carpets, curtains, pillows and trash bags are all in-bounds as our remaining 11 girls assemble their own lines of Ghetto Couture.

Truly fuckin painful, bitches.

Jay-Z and his other b**ch get a little wet for the cameras in Rihanna's leadoff single "Umbrella." [watch above]

I guess Beyonce doesn't really have a choice but to learn how to get along with the side chick. A $20 spot says they've passed each other the milk in the morning for their Kashi.

This week's throwback is hip-hop's resident Rock of Gibraltar, MC Lyte. She won't allow us to embed the 1988 classic, "Lyte As A Rock" so... um... [click here to watch].

Do you understand the metaphoric phrase "lyte as a rock?"

Good. I don't either. But the shit is hot.

I thought we needed to hear from a female MC that's worth a shit today.

Sloppy Joes apparently has a single.

...as Cam'ron would say.

Last night on "Run's House," Diggy tries to shake off Daddy Warbucks' bucks, Jojo plays "Captain Save-A-Ho" and Angela single-handedly raises SnackWells stock 3 and a half points on the NASDAQ.

This week's installment of "Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School" is all about "etticupiscupiss", as our friend Saaphyri would say. These girls are in for some much-needed home-training at the hands of Mo'prah, Simon, Horsey, a lady named Miss Swan and a non-Flavor Flav "Bachelor."

Let's just hope none of the simpletons got too drunk off of the nice wine. You know, the one whose top doesn't screw off.

This is a new classic. Thank you, Atlanta!

She was addicted to Common.

Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawd...

Recording live from somewhere in the late 90s, on-time Brooklyn saviors Mos Def & Talib Kweli (with the help of DJ Hi-Tek) took their "Definition" [watch above] to the global hip-hop audience. Younger, hungrier and, quite frankly, much better than they are today, the Brooklyn boys on the other side of the velvet rope came in, drove their dollar van and left a trail of lyrical sunshine at every intersection of Flatbush Avenue.

You gettin' dollars from dealin' wit Rev. Run!

This week on "Run's House," The Good Reb'm lets his separation anxiety overcome his better judgment. Jojo plays for his freedom, and Angela says "Fuck college. I'm ballin'." Justine doesn't say much because Run doesn't really let her speak.

She makes entirely too much sense.

Charm School is officially in session, simple bitches!

This "Whip Appeal" cat Alonzo is hilarious!

Aight... Now that I've caught my breath... Who's ready for some "personal development?" I know I sure am. Over the course of 2 seasons, the 13 select Flavorettes (ugh) made asses of themselves by taking part in the most degrading and offensive programming Niggadom has ever known. In "Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School," the girls are being fed the pipedream of retrieving their dignity...

and $50,000 cash money.

I'm still not completely sure as to what exactly I bore witness last night. The "I Love New York" reunion special brought some closure to a season of Klump water that made us all dumber by the second. The parade of bitch niggas mercifully came to a truly marvelous culmination last night.

The revolution will be televised... and hosted by Carmelo Baby Moms.

Sigh. High school can be so damn rough.

Watch Lil Mama navigate the mean corridors of Brooklyn High with the worlds most dangerous weapon.

Any guesses as to what that may be?

Ha! No, not an educated mind, silly! L'oreal "Lip Gloss!" [watch above]

Previously on "Talkin' Videos"...

PS3: In the wake of this mess, there is only one appropriate throwback tomorrow.

This would be the one.

You’ve all seen and heard it by now.

Nationally syndicated and televised radio host, Don Imus, shook up the world last week with his incendiary comments toward the Rutgers University Women’s Basketball team after their National Championship loss to the University of Tennessee. His painfully misguided attempt at humor included referring to the young women as “nappy-headed hoes” and asserting that their team looks like the NBA's Toronto Raptors.

I think Dave Chappelle would consider this scenario a matter of "cultural responsibilty."

An all-new season of "Run's House" is upon us.

I must say, I'm very surprised they decided to continue this program in the wake of Justine's miscarriage. I thought they'd want their privacy respected on the heels of such family tragedy. I was wrong. Instead, as usual, Big Chief Reverend J. Runbone insists that black folk witness his "strength" in the face of adversity and implores that we use his televised life as a template for quality living.

Yep. That sounds just about where we left off. As it reads in Proverbs, "ain't shit new under the sun." (Direct quote from Pimp Solomon)

I was looking for a clip from Comedy Central's "Halfway Home" to see what you guys thought of the show. I think it's pretty funny. However, I stumbled upon this shit and was less than pleased.

I guess some people think this kind of thing is funny, though a startling majority of us are one missed check away from being right there with Albert.

Everybody stay fly; get money; kill and fuck bitches!

I saw a couple of interesting suggestions yesterday. However, none of them prompted a sense of urgency as this one has. Much like most black professional athletes, San Antonio Spurs point guard and Longoria-to-be, Tony Parker has been bitten by the rappin' bug. Also much like aforementioned counterparts Kobe Bryant, Shaquille O'Neal and Allen Iverson, his shit is less than stellar. Fabolous and frenchie du jour, Booba, lend their mercenary services to the Pepe Le Pew-scented doo-doo fest that is the "Top of the Game" [watch above] video.

I guess it's hard at the top.

It's only right.

In honor of "Red Gone Wild" and the support we plan to show the mishandled Brick City ambassador, today's throwback, as per your request, is some older shit from him. I ain't even gonna lie to you. I couldn't find a quality "I'll Bee Dat" on EweToube, but for the first time found an acceptable version of the "How High" remix. [watch above]

That'll work.

Welcome back, Red!

Redman emerged from his IDJ exile last week with the long, long, long-awaited release of "Red Gone Wild." The lead single is the Timbaland-produced "Put It Down." [watch above] Quite frankly, I'm surprised President Carter had enough funds allocated into anything other than the defense budget to spring for a Timbo track.

He's been something like a Black Republican of late.

The motorcade parade of bitch niggas has finally concluded!

Have a Pop Tart and a Newport with me this morning as we wave goodbye the Talkin’ Videos way! In the “I Love New York” finale, Tiffany drags Famous the Stallionaire (Chance) and Tango “overseas” for a Mexican adventure that doesn’t involve swallowing and condoms.

Okay… maybe some swallowing.

Not my ass!

I got Bapes!