TALKIN' VIDEOS
the latest HATE on Hip-Hop TV, Movies and Music Videos
The White Rapper Show: All Y'all Skrippers!
Posted on January 31, 2007 11:17 AM
This week on “The White Rapper Show” our remaining gentry have apparently earned the right to contribute something musical to our great culture. The Magnificent Seven split into two teams and visited Justin Blaze at his Baseline Studios to make what Serch refers to as a “Club Banger.” I’d much more readily refer to it as Marion Barry smoke break soundtrack.
Yes, it was that bad on both sides; and in case you're wondering, we're still playing up to the stereotypes of black culture than training and assessing MCs.
While I have nothing against strip clubs, their employees or patrons (that's not a drink), when I think of skrippin club music en masse, I think of BET UnCut bullshit that’s primarily devoid of talent or effort. Only a handful do it properly even among seasoned skrip professionals. Why torture these poor white kids this way? If Nas can’t make a decent one, why should 100 Proof?
Serch telling someone their rhyme scheme is simplistic is like the pot calling T-Weed black. I know I wasn’t very old, but I do believe I remember Pete Nice scraping the floor with Serch on damn near every 3rd Bass track.
“When I say ‘Club Banger’ I mean a record that’s going to play in a club.” Are you fucking serious? That needs to be explained? I guess it does when you think “Club Banger” (i.e. “Walk It Out”) is synonymous with “Skrippin’ Music” (i.e. “What That Thang Smell Like.”)
Hearing the instrumental, Self-Hate… I mean, Jus Rhyme, really had a "Hustle & Flow" relapse on that shit! “How about ‘Beat that bitch? No? ummm… 'Stomp that ho?' Hmm…”
Ah, I remember the group of white pseudo-revolutionaries with Che Guevara t-shirts that "partied their way to social justice" back in college. One of them was a rapper too. They did nitrous in their rooms, scared the shit out of me, and failed to make any kind of sense regarding their plans for societal upheaval. Whenever I’d ask them what the plan was, they’d mumble something about a “Ghetto Revival,” do another line of coke and make their way to Starbucks.
While Powder is concerned with the mindstate of the white children he’s been poisoning with his message of self-hatred and the black children he’s been confusing with handfuls of U.N.-issued cheese and powdered milk, it’s quite refreshing to see Jon Boy stepping up and leading his team to puff-puff supremacy. I was impressed with dude in the challenge. For the first time ever I felt like his verse was clean.
Eh. Maybe that’s just my brain finally acclimating itself to the substandard level of talent I’ve been forced to follow for a few weeks now. I’m confused. I’m starting to see different sides to these kids. John Brown looks less and less like a shithead every week and I may not be the smartest nigga in the prison library, but I get the notion Persia is feeling this man.
“Okay, John. I’m sorry. You can get me back. Go ahead. Put your dick on my lips.”
On the other side of “Tha White House,” Sullee, Shamrock and 100 Proof are writing a singalong hook that is complete and utter suicide. I had to look away. I still feel ill just trying to recall Paul Wall, Jr. wailing, “tooooooo-niiiiiiiiiight.” I was however, thoroughly entertained by 100 Proof’s “Let’s swap body fluids!” exchange and the subsequent reactions.
Having completed a hard day of bullshitting themselves at Baseline, Serch invites new white supergroup La Coka Nostra over for pizza and Quaaludes. I love Everlast, but damn, all I can think about is how Eminem put 2 dicks in his blowhole a few years ago, so everything he said sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher.
I never knew Ill Bill was capable of civilized, normal conversation. Responsible for my favorite putdown of all time (“Go eat a dick sandwich!”), Mr. Black Helicopters put some real game into these kids’ ears that Jus Rhyme really needed to be soaking up. Jokes aside, he and Everlast leading the white rapper support group proves to be the most pertinent and constructive portion of the series to date.
John Brown looking like somebody just tickled his balls with that Coka Nostra hoodie on! Hallelujah, holler back!
What better place to test out your freshly-made club banger than seedy Bronx skeet palace, Sin City with Kool Keith? If Laqueshia and Precious like it, then you’re in there.
Didn’t it just tug at your heartstrings to see Sullee carefully droppin them ones? Brother, you ain’t Young Hefner until you can at least drop some Pamper money in one sitting. A dancer ain't gonna bring her baby a pack of fuckin Fitti because you don't know how to behave yourself in a classy establishment!
By the time the song is over you done dropped 4 singles on the floor. A girl’s supposed to damn near break her neck on the pole for that? She can’t even go to Boston Market with 4 damn dollars, nigga. If you’re gonna go and indulge in that kind of entertainment, show some respect for the craft! Support your local skripper!
We need a skripper union!
Watching Jus Rhyme lip sync his verse really made my week. That’s gotta be my next .gif file request. I need to have permanent evidence of Jus Rhyme trying to “Smack That” all on the floor. That and... well... the dildo on the lips thing.
As confusing and contradictory as this entire program is, one thing that became painfully clear by mid episode was that I was gonna lose another Final Four selection. Sink-pissin ass 100 Proof didn’t have any tricks in his Mohawk and joins G-Child in the realm of early 90s-era white rappers still better than MC Serch. Jon Boy and Jus Rhyme get to walk (with VH1 supervision) to the bodega for another week.
Let me find out Persia’s gonna be the new hook queen. You knew homegirl was holdin pipes.
Oh yeah... Talkin Videos 2006 Awards... First Installment... Tomorrow!
Comments
Man, you are fucking hilarious!!!!!!!
ya recaps be funny as fuck
i still cant watch VH-1 reality shows in fear of a reverse of intellect.
nah jus bullshittin, but maybe i should actually try to catch the show one day, i know they play them repeats like at least 12 out of 24hrs in a day
Ghetto Revival Baby!!!
John Brown is the next big thing to blow
Fitti diapers is the Shit!! Fuck Pampers, Luvs, & bitch ass Huggies.
Real Ghetto babys wear Fittis, my dude
Just Rhyme is gay
lol @ Paul Wall Jr.
Persia got skills - I bet she can suck a mean dick. I know she practice with that dildo
Ghetto Revival Baby!!!!
Hallelujah - Holla Back!!!!!
Probably the worst review Ive ever read...I think you just write this review to try and make yourself feel like your actually funny. I cant even follow what your writing because you jump around more than House of Pain...thats my one white rapper reference.
I'd call ACS on a woman I saw buyin a pack of Fittis.
Them shits be cutting the babies up. They smell like recycled garbage and they leak like you might as well not put a diaper on the kid.
This show is 1 of the dumbest yet funniest show n history... i wanna pipe persia jus 4 fun but i think shes a dyke she was enjoyen that lap dance a lil 2 much but hey if she is a dyke ill still pipe her
Hallejuah holla back baby
Ghetto revival
King of the burbs!!!
They should make a Black Rocker Show.
Bring the Black Panthers back, its a fucking state of emergency.
"POWER TO THE PEOPLE!!!!"
"John Brown looking like somebody just tickled his balls with that Coka Nostra hoodie on! Hallelujah, holler back!"
Thats the funniest shit I seen all day. I lughed my ass off on that one.........cause it's true. Me and my wife were laughin at that shit when we seen it on TV. Did you see when Persia was buggin out when she was talkin about how amped she was that Just Blaze spoke on her track and they did a close up of Jon Brown and he was all huddled up against the wall all smiling and quiet like he was about to get some pussy for the first time...................lmao...shit was funny as hell.........Good Blog
LMAO, I thought me and my boys were the only ones to remember "What that Thang Smell Like?"
What ya'll know about "Time for Freakin!"
What That Thang Smell Like, was a visual masterpiece with a soundscape equivalent to a wounded dog crying for help in an empty forrest.
What That Thang Smell Like, was a visual masterpiece with a soundscape equivalent to a wounded dog crying for help in an empty forrest.
Posted by: Mike Jones Phone at January 31, 2007 2:55 PM
hahahahahahahahahaha!
I wanna kick it toniiiiiight!
oh man...I almost pissed on myself this shit had me laughin so hard...everything you said was true
Jon Brown might've broke Persia off, before he smelled that dildo, then he said " Uh uh boo boo" 'cause I know what that thang smell like already
Thank you.
I was up all night living on an old Cribs with Kimora and Russell and LOVING every minute of it. Then I came back to feed off some old recap of Ron Mexico's and there is a BRAND new RECAP. Thanks for putting me on the "track", RonMexico, now I'm a myspacewhore. Thank you. Just so ONE other person says so.
Sincerely,
Jus4me
you're welcome!
Ah, I remember the group of white pseudo-revolutionaries with Che Guevara t-shirts that "partied their way to social justice" back in college. One of them was a rapper too
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wouldn't you know about anything pseudo, your name, your talent and your knowledge are all fake.
Truth Hurts
next tyme they do a white rapper casting call post on sohhh.com so i cud go and put some sense into the show and if anybody know or get a hold of that boy from davis cali sayin that bootsy ghetto rival gatbage tell em JUST1 from stockton cali wanna battle wat it iz!!!!!!!!!
I THINK PERSIA AND JON BROWN ARE STARTING TO FEEL EACH OTHER I THOUGHT PERSIA HATED HIM NOW SHE'S ALL DREAMY EYED SAYING THEY WORK WELL TOGETHER WTF!! NEWAY JON BROWN IS SO CUTE WISH HE STAYED ON MY BLOCK NEWAY HE HAS STAR APPEAL. 100 PROOFS BODY FLUID LINE WAS NASTY REMEMBER JUS BLAZEZ FACE HE WAS LIKE EWWW GROSS!!! SHAMROCK IS LIKE A VERY POOR MANS PAUL WALL DIDN'T HE JUST SING THE PEANUT BUTTER JELLY SONG IN HIS ELIMINATION RAP WELL HALLELUYAH HOLLA BACK JON BROWN THE WORLDS NEXT ICON STRAIGHT UP GHETTO REVIVAL BABY!!!!
am i the only one who thought everlast won that battle? em i thought made a fool of himself, aligning and then beefing with limp bizkit, and aligning with kid rock, he just so clearly was representing what's wack...and then relying on his crew over recycled beats. i thought everlast and then evidence both came with better songs. but i know there's a lot of em fans out.
yeah evidence did serve em in that battle... but em murdered everlast..
evidence- you aint a tru tiger.... lyer your from warren... the trailer trash town where daddy stuck it to you... thats why u hate your mother caue she never tried to stop it. you aint hip hop you pop extra popular to little girls kids and the trenchcoat mafia..
a
true, i think evidence did best, but "whitey's revenge" i feel is underrated. the beat is cold and he comes with what a rapper like everlast is gonna come with in a battle. just straight forward "yous a bitch" kind of stuff. but i can't remember anything em said to everlast except that he likes kid rock better. no doubt em is the better battle rapper but i just don't know why people act like something so mediocre should have ended everlast's career.
i thought em would die his hair back to brown after "you bite from george michael"
@ Ron Mexico
I'm only posting this on here cuz I know you read the blog are an intelligent enough man to speak up when something needs to be spoken on.
You need to holla at your bosses and let them know that SOHH Fabolous on "Ya Heard" blog got a direct link to porn on their page. That's illegal bro, and not somethin these children need access to like that.
That could cost SOHH.COM a grip. I posted somethin' on that blog, and sent somethin to SOHH.COM.
If you got a direct link or address to somebody I should notify before it comes down hard on SOHH...let me know.
I know it's gonna bring the haters out on me, but I don't care. It's about doin what's right.
Christ Bless!
PZ
PZ,
I feel what you're saying but you really need to pick your battles. You might as well get ready to type all weekend cuz most of the "popular" blog sites have this video up.
You might as well get ready to type all weekend cuz most of the "popular" blog sites have this video up.
Posted by: petu at February 1, 2007 2:19 PM
--------------------------
Do they "have the video up", or do they just make it known that it's out there...allowing you to go hunt for it?
That's one thing, but having the direct link is another.
I wonder what the sponsors like "Nissan" and them would think about it? I'm sure they don't realize it, and I'm sure if "4CONTROL Media Inc" knew it, they'd be shuttin it down real quick.
I see they ain't done nothin about it yet. Aight den.
"all I can think about is how Eminem put 2 dicks in his blowhole a few years ago, so everything he said sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher."
______________________________________
Now thats some funny shit! But for some reason that leaves a terrible mental image. Ew. But ya, Ghetto Revival Baby-
Hallelujah - Holla Back!
Probably the worst review Ive ever read...
Hallelujah - Holla Back!
Persia 4 Mayor!
Duke, you are funny!
But why the hate for Serch? Pete Nice served up Serch on every song? WHat?!? Do you remember "Step into the AM"? Serch lit that all up. And I'm not sure Em got Everlast like that. Dude has been around since Rhyme Syndicate...he's got skills. And did you peep that Eardrums remix on Dilated People's album?
As for the show, I'm just interested in seeing what happens in the aftermath.
I cant stand that weak ass mc bitch(Serch) never catch my bumpen his shit.Fool is a has been, even at his best he was weak, and his show, they might as well had a retard do the show, that mother fucka is boring. Im doring some major hating today. He worse than vanilla ice. And he jocks all the black people that come on the show, the ones with real talent. Im tired now peace
I THINK THAT SHAMROCK IZ GOING TO WIN THIS SHIT.AND PERSIA IS AN UGLY SLUT BUTT.AND UM THAT GHETTO REVIVAL SHIT NEEDS 2 STOP HE IZ JUST A FAKE ASS WANNA BEE BLACK GUY.OHHHH AND JUS RHYME NEEDS TO GO BACK HOME WITH ALL THAT BEEIN GOODIE GOODIE AND SHIT TALKIN BOUT "IM A POLITICAL RAPPER" AND SHIT.
FUCK THE WHITE RAPPERS PERSIA SUCKS JOHN BROWNS DICK IS A FAT WASH UP
What are you talking about? Em didn't get anything on Everlast. After Whitey's Revenge he said that was it(one song) He challenged Em to a fight on MTV he wouldn't do it. Em had to keep putting out songs because he couldn't get to him. Everlast even said he liked Em's rapping and found his songs about him funny. I like both of them, but that's the deal.
JOHN BROWN'S NO. 1 FAN
I love the White Rapper Show,
I can't seem to turn it off;
I'm a fan of John Brown,
I don't care if ya'll think he's soft;
Ya'll say he corney,
But I like him still;
Every time he comes out the Ice Chamber,
He proves he got skill;
Persia talked all that crap,
Yet she cracked under pressure;
Flat out all yall won't admit,
But J. Brown flow is just better;
I dont want to knock Shamrock,
Or Jus Rhyme the white KRS-1;
Shamrock might have a chance,
But Just Rhyme is already done.
well idk but i love john brown && he is 4 sure gonna win shamrock gots some skillz && i fuk wit him 2. but i jus kno that john brown will win hes da shit lol hes flow is so nice & everyone says hes an asshole & shit bu wut rapper dnt seem a lil bit cocky or seem lk hes a dick lol they all seem lk they think there cool & 2 good so y does everyone hate on john brown
who thought it was funny when John B's friend came on the show and John looked all embarrased about it like his boy wasnt rugged enough...he's got what it is to be a rapper/black/white all fucked up man....
I disagree with you. Indeed, I’m not giving a ringing disagreement, but just sayin’ what I think. I have my opinion, you have yours.
That IS progress. Your blogging skills are getting better and better. I had a great time reading this post.
Comments written above do not represent the views or opinions of SOHH.com, 4CONTROL Media, Inc. or any of its affiliates. Comments may be deleted at our sole discretion.