TALKIN' VIDEOS

Good day, everyone! I’m Ron Mexico.

If you’re just joining us, you may be wondering “What the HELL is going on in this section of the SOHH blog network?!”

If you’ve stumbled upon “Talking Videos” with myself, Ron Mexico, you may have already noticed that this is not your run-of-the-mill review column. This ain't Rap City, bitches. You’ve probably also noticed that I don’t seem to give a fuck. For all of those who may have gotten it twisted, I think today is a good day to recap the past couple of weeks and to formally introduce myself, my column, and why I do what I do. Come, now… Follow me!

When the good folks at SOHH hired me, they told me they wanted quality music video reviews, but that I shouldn’t hold back or compromise my thoughts and ideas. I think so far they’ve gotten a little more than they’ve bargained for in that respect. I’ve gotten some flack about some of the things I’ve said about some artists and their songs and videos. I want everyone from this point forward to realize something…

This is an entertainment column!

If you can’t take a joke, you probably shouldn’t be here. That’s like ordering a bacon, egg and cheese and then yelling at Ahkmed at the corner store for trying to hand you some pork. (Like HE wanted to be touchin' that swine himself!) I write this column for everyone who wants to take a break from his or her day, watch a music video, and have a good laugh and discussion in the process.

For this reason, every artist and every video is subject to the “hate.” Even if I love the video, artist or song… actually… ESPECIALLY if I love the artist, video or song, the jokes are coming. (Yes, Even Pac and Biggie)

Part of my problem with the music industry (especially as it pertains to hip-hop) is that the videos reflect an artist culture wherein rappers are forced to take themselves entirely too seriously. Does he REALLY have 15 machine guns in his trunk? Is he REALLY Jeezy the Snowman? What about those video hoes? How much did they cost? Here on Talking Videos, we make it a point to analyze the aesthetic, but it would be criminal and belittling to our readers to pretend like everything we see in all of these corporate-funded farces of our culture is kosher. I also try to encourage a culture of discussion. We’ve already had some heated debates about more than just what’s on the videos.

With that said… Over the course of the first two weeks, our topics of discussion and victims have included (in no particular order): Bobby Brown, The Fanta Girls, G-Unit, Chris Rock, Kris Kross, Coke blunts, Kelly Price, Popeye, ATCQ (that’s message board slang, y’all), Ying-Yang Twins, Nickelodeon, Fantasy Island, Relativity, Baller Blockin’, Hatin’, Will Smith, Hatin’ on Will Smith, and the new UPN series Extreme Hoin’ Challenge.

Since there’s plenty more to come, I want to extend my formal invitation to you and all your friends to spend a few minutes with us on the SOHH blog network every so often. We’ve got some really exciting stuff coming that I can’t even mention just yet.

Speaking of mentioning shit… This is also where I’ll take the time to address some mailings/posts I’ve received about the blogs.

On my first post I was greeted with this one:

What? What is the purpose of this article. Your jokes that I guess were suppose to be funny were corny as hell the whisper song gets it poppin the club and yeah they ugly and crazy but they serve they purpose as entertainers dumb ass

Posted by: Key at May 11, 2005 10:34 AM

What are you, the Ying-Yang TRIPLET? When did I ever question the Ying Yang Twins’ purpose as entertainers? I merely reviewed their video and commented on some questionable lyrics. This by no means indicates that I wouldn’t put a 10-spot in a skripper’s g-string to this song. Also, if I ever needed to offer to show someone my dick in a creepy manner, this is probably the song I’d choose to do so. While the Ying-Yangs do serve a purpose musically, they do not need to shoot videos trying to be sexy, yet actually looking like they just got done freebasing. Damnit, Key! I don’t come down to where you work and slap the dick out of your mouth, do I?

Sup Mexico!

You disappoint me today. I'm here lookin to get my laugh on at some rapper's expense and you talkin about Ali. Damn, reading your tame commentary today was a waste of 4 minutes of MY life. What... you was hung over from partying this weekend?

Mexico... step that game up kid... i'll be lookin for the ether in tomorrow's dose.

Posted by: big squid at May 16, 2005 06:46 PM

Squidley, sorry to disappoint! I’m not going to be “droppin’ the ether” on some poor unsuspecting rapper EVERY day. Some reviews will be disappointing in that… well… they’re just going to be reviews. I still thought I got some shots in on Shaheed though, but oh well.

you are biased

first mention how qb finest was a dope album then you can say whatever you want

song was bad, video was horrible
but that album is dope is hell and only got 1 commercial orientated single

and g rap and rakim aint from queensbridge
you mustve been in mexico all these years

Posted by: ILL at May 20, 2005 06:00 PM

Wow. This motherfucker actually said "orientated." Just like AZ! Congratulations!

First off, I would never lie to the public by telling them that I thought "QB’s Finest" was a dope album. I said it was a dope concept until they somehow managed to fuck it up. I am a huge Nas fan, I own every album he’s ever touched, defend the man to the death, and still would NEVER recommend that CD to another human being. “Oochie Wally” actually boasts an incredible beat and could have made a far better song. I also never said Rakim or Kool G. Rap were from The Bridge. I know I use college words sometimes, but read a little closer, big homie.

P.S.: Find me a human being without a bias and you can have my job. No questions asked. I’ll also buy all your friends a copy of "QB’s Finest."

I think Houston may have seen that video right before he gouged his eye out.

Posted by: Dj Nahlege at May 16, 2005 07:05 PM [about Ali Shaheed Muhummad – “Banga”]

Hahaha! Excellent!

I also want to say, good job on the Bow Wow hating this weekend. I laughed my ass off reading that shit. Please, don’t hold back anymore! You all have earned carte blanche. Fire at will! See you tomorrow when we get the jump on yet another fun-filled week in the world of rap videos. It's gonna be a long, hot summer!

As usual, if you know a video you’d like to see reviewed here, give me the name, a reason and a link and you just might see your video here on SOHH with a special shoutout to you, of course. All recommendations, comments, questions and concerns can be sent to my personal email, ronnie_mexxx@yahoo.com.

No matter where you are…

I’m Ron Mexico,
You stay classy, San Diego!