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We Met in College, He Schooled Me on Heartbreak

7 Comments » March 17, 2006

unforgivibleStory4.jpgI met him the summer before my freshman year in college. My attraction for him was immediate. He was tall, athletic and charming. He had me at ‘holla’.

And since the feelings were mutual we became instantly inseparable. I couldn’t decipher whether it was lust or love, but whatever it was I hadn’t felt it ever before in my seventeen years of life. I couldn’t get enough of him and my thirst grew every time he whispered in my ear. I didn’t have to look any further. I had found my dream man.

I knew madd girls liked him because he was sexy and one of the better athletes at my university. But I held every confidence that he was my man. And I felt that everyone else knew it too.

One day when I began receiving mysterious hang up phone calls at all hours of the day and night. Finally, thanks to the invention of caller ID, I called the number back. On the other end was a sweet and almost scared sounding voice of a confused and hurt female.

She asked my status with my man and when I stated my claim there was an uncomfortable silence. Turns out, the man of my dreams had been the man of her dreams for the last year! I had already put in four years with him at that point.

Never knowing heartache before, I couldn’t comprehend what to do with what I was feeling. Part of me wanted to beat that bitch down, part of me wanted to cry, part of me wanted to go to the local bar and get shit faced, but none of me wanted to set eyes on him. Like in the movie The Best Man, I couldn’t imagine him sexing her up when I was so giving of myself.

After months of hearing his explanations and excuses I finally said goodbye to my dream man and hello to being single. Dating and exploring other men was a new playing field for me because I was with him from 17 to 22 years old. If I learned anything from that relationship it was not to be so naïve. People close to you can hurt you too.

Now at 29, I am more certain of myself then ever before. I don’t know whatever became of him, but regardless of the outcome, that love made me a better woman.

- Lois Fame

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Comments

Someone answer this...why does everything with the male species lead to heart break and crying??? and why is it always about the woman fixing her.. and men never fixing them and why does it start so early in life.. even tho most men have been through many of othe same experiences in our formative years???
why does it always lead to us becoming better women as if we arent good women before all this drama happens to us???
anyone got any possible theories???

Posted by sheryl walker March 17, 2006 02:31 PM

whats up with all the hate directed at the male species though? Femalez are just as shaaaaady...

Posted by cheem da dree, March 17, 2006 07:45 PM

Fair question. Surely, there must be one "Do right man" in the world!

Posted by Karma March 17, 2006 10:15 PM

It seems like every woman I know in existance is going through man problems or has gone through man problems, myself included. There is no explanation to why there isn't any loyalty these days. I don't want to sound like a bitter female and place all the blame on the men. Because we ,too, see all the call signs and we choose to ignore them and continue to be with these men. My grandmamma used to say "If you see a fool, bump his head" and that's exactly what these fellas are doing to us. It doesn't matter if you are a wife , girlfriend or jumpoff. The worst of any love situation can happen to you. The only advice I can offer to anyone, and I must continue to remind myself as well, is to keep living. Keep striving to have the best in life with or without a man.

Posted by Dee-Dee March 18, 2006 03:38 AM

Every good woman needs to be put in their place, to serve the man. Now this girl will be a better woman and serve her man right.

Posted by EZ March 19, 2006 12:25 PM

There are men out there that are waiting for a woman to let them love them. But...we all know the saying...NICE GUYS FINISH LAST. Women need to wise up and stop giving all their gifts to no good men. Lets step our game up ladies.

Posted by mayma March 20, 2006 04:31 AM

The problem w/ some women is that satisfaction always comes by trying to change/fix a man. Most Women are not satisfied with a man that is good for them/ Women find it challenging and exciting to have a man that they constantley have something bad to complain about or have a problem that a women tries to fix.(BAD BOY FANTASY) Or-(constantly compare there girlfriends/husband or partner to their own) Ladies! There is a difference between men that are good to you and a men that is good for you!
UNFORTUNANTLEY SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO KISS A FEW TOADS BEFORE YOU CAN RECOGNIZE A PRINCE!
UNFORTUNANTLEY SOME WOMEN LEARN THAT TOO LATE! LOOSING A PRINCE BECAUSE YOU ARE CHASING TOADS!

Posted by Crispin March 20, 2006 12:41 PM

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