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I Thought He Was Godsent, But He Turned Into A Devil

14 Comments » March 24, 2006

WomanCryingB.jpgHe was tall, dark brown skinned and at that time handsome. He played eloquently on a basketball team and took me to Bible study, where I decided to recommit my life to Christ. But our relationship was anything but Christian. He had a bad temper, and although he did not drink or do drugs, he would out of nowhere just decide to hit me in my face!

After 9 years of marriage and being faithful and praying for the domestic violence to stop I got tired of the fights that occasionally turned violent. I lost interest in him and began to want this younger man that would often bring comfort to me and help me to believe in myself again. My husband would leave me without money, although we had a child and a baby boy. However, my young male friend would bring me money so I could get somewhere safe for the night.

I eventually separated from my husband and after some bad advice from a pastor, returned. I was there one week when I got hurt. I was a community activist and taught drama to youth and put plays on cable. He was jealous, and after rehearsal one night, he hit me in my eye and knocked it out of socket. I was taken to the hospital and had surgery.

Now, I walk with my head down in order to see well. I have a scar above my left eye, and under my eye and an artificial eye bone. This was in 1992 and I still have the long scar.

It gets worse. Fourteen years later he haunted me again. A pastor in New York became one of his advocates and unknowingly to me began putting me under surveillance through some women in his congregation that were Feds and told everyone that I was not allowed to marry another man. I continue to be filled with pain, and wait until God gives me another man that won't be intimidated by him or these people that spread lies and never spoke to me.

He married another woman with 5 sons. It's been 14 years since we've been divorced, however, the trauma remains.

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Comments

I'm so sorry for what he has done to you.

Posted by guy March 24, 2006 01:08 PM

I'm glad that you got out, but did the ex-husband go to prison?? That nigga needs to be in the BOOTY HOUSE, big niggas in there hate wife beaters. What kind of church was this, sounds like an occult. I would suggest to talk to the authorities about this bitch ass nigga. Me personally, I would had "wacked" that faggot

Posted by gully son March 24, 2006 01:41 PM

mami u can't let urself suffer like that, i dont care if a bible thumpin bigot tells you otherwise. You need to protect yourself, and you shoulda got his punk ass locked up the first time for knockin u in the eye. But girl, if they even got the "God of peace and love" lovers stalkin you, now you have no choice but to take that step. Go get a P.F.A. or Protection From Abuse, and merely state your terms, and if he or anyone breaks them.......he'll know your suffering baby girl.....in the pen.

Keep yo head up
eyes open

peace

Posted by phillylove March 24, 2006 01:56 PM

My god...I don't even know what to say. I know that was rough but you came this far, keep it moving and you'll be ok. Instead of looking for someone to heal your heart now, maybe you should chill a while. Let all the bad stuff go, then try it again when you're ready. There's definitely someone out there for you.

Believe that. On a side note I have to ask where's your family? If someone did that to anyone in my family, I wouldn't even be emailing this I'd be writing you from the pen.

Stay strong.

Posted by Knowledge B. March 24, 2006 01:57 PM

Black women, I have this issue with you. Learn to love yourself. I hate to hear a woman say “I’m tired of him hitting me or cheating on me” You see the main problem is the “ing” If either of that shit happen once, drop dat nigga. It is just that freakin simple. It takes a lot for me to fight another dude, let alone hit a defenseless woman. I hate dudes that hit women and if I knew one personally I would whoop his ass. But there is your solution, get some freakin self esteem and leave the nigga after the first incident. There is no excuse for violence against women. My daughter is two years old, I will make sure she get her first black belt by 12 years old, and by the time she is 18 she will have a pretty 38. Caliber gun with a freakin Barbie grip to blast any punk ass who want to put his hands on her. I couldn’t be a woman, ya’ll have no common sense. What da F**k? Get some damn self esteem!!! Rule number one, never date a jealous guy, that crap is not cute. It always starts with a jealous man so don’t date them. If you do have to shoot him, put an ice pick in his hands and tell the police it was self defense.!!!

Posted by C-RED March 24, 2006 02:19 PM

I agree with C-Red.
Black women are always talking about how their man is beating them. But you are too stupid to leave the nigga after the first punch to the eye.
Get the hell away from these punk ass niggaz.
Because I can gaurantee you that he never hit a man the way he hit you. And for that he will always be a punk ass nigga.

Black Women stand up for yourselves and don't ever stay with a nigga who so much as mentions hitting you.

Posted by Essex March 24, 2006 03:27 PM

That is a sad story. PLEASE. KEEP YOUR FAITH IN THE LORD. He will see you through. Don't worry you will remarry to a loving husband who will treat you like you're supposed to be. As for your ex-husband, I hope one day he'll repent, and come to you for forgiveness. As for that phony pastor and his cronies, they need to get off the pulpit, if they're going to harass a woman who left her husband for a JUST CAUSE. He broke the marriage, not you. Don't feel guilt at all.

Posted by The TN Man March 24, 2006 04:30 PM

all i can say is pull a soprano on him- what do i mean?.....wake up this morning-and buy yourself a gun!

Posted by yaok March 24, 2006 06:54 PM

yo thats crazy and fucked up i recently had a baby girl and if any man laid their hands on her i'll drop a grenade n his draws real talk

Posted by killa March 24, 2006 06:57 PM

I know what to say! Stand up for yourself and fight back. Don't let this motha fucka do that shit to you. That's what I hate about being a guy the most is that we can't love and respect women. We have to beat them, why can't we love and treat them with respect. One Advice: Next time he does something, don't be afraid to resort to violence. And when I say violence I mean any kind. Gun use, knife, a bat, a steel pipe, whatever helps you to teach him.

Posted by Jin March 25, 2006 03:56 AM

whoa!!!!

im "SO" sorry for the pain that the brother put you through. i can only hope and believe with you that God will send you tha "real" man of your dreams. but remember not all men are the same just like arent all women the same. God is there and he loves U!!! so stay true, stay beatiful, say you...dont change for noone but allow God to help you change to be more like HIS SON(JESUS)!!!

holla and God bless!!!

Posted by Tha Future aka DJ Triumph March 25, 2006 10:36 AM

There is no excuse for domestic violence but I just feel like a lot is being left out of this story.

Posted by Dat Nigga March 25, 2006 01:32 PM

u need to get some weapons or sumtin and if he bothers u again shoot him in the nuts. Or maybe a brass knuckle and punch HIS eye out of the fuckin socket

Posted by Sig March 25, 2006 03:10 PM

Im sorry to hear this story. However these things happen in our day to day society. Stop looking for a man and look for love inside yourself. Your faith will atke you a long way

Posted by Tanja March 27, 2006 01:18 PM

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