1224 Confessions

Confessions Of A Down Low Man: You Going To Answer That?

Posted on May 8, 2008 10:00 AM


Continued from Stranger At My Door

Now that I have your attention – I hope you didn’t think I was just going to penetrate you long, hard, and deep without dropping some knowledge and inspiration on you. I really do hope you get to know me a little better than that.

Don’t worry I am going to get back to the tall, handsome – No! FINE, good-loving specimen of a professional athlete named Preston. But, first I want to make sure you all understand something. It’s important that everyone reading this is clear about a few things.

As I mentioned previously, I am human. Erred. Flawed. Imperfect. I have my weaknesses. I pray heartedly and I have a relationship with God. I seek to be on divine purpose each day. This journey is not easy, nor is it for the swift. It is given to those who endureth. Trust me, I endure each day. I take my time and weigh my options, opinions, and thoughts. I am not quick to rush into anything. Not unless he is my type of dude. Okay, I’m just kidding. But, I do work hard to be of service to my fellow brothers and sisters. I work diligently to empower and enlighten others on how complicated and challenging life can sometimes be and how, even though, we all fall short of the glory of God we are all still his children, His creation, and He loves each and everyone us.

Iyanla Vanzant – google her for those of you not familiar with her and her work. She is a powerful mother/sister and has even a more powerful message in her books. Years ago, Iyanla gave me some wonderful advice. She told me, “Folks think that once they become enlightened that they somehow do not need to continue growing, learning, and seeking to become better people. The only thing about enlightenment is that you learn better how to manage your own shit.”

Those words stuck with me, and I live by them to this day. No matter who you are and how enlightened you think you are there is still a lot of growing and learning you must continue.

Now, back to the regularly scheduled program of Confessions Of A Down Low Man.

When Preston left me in the glow of the hotel bed I could still smell his scent. It lingered on the sheets, the pillow, and on my skin. I buried my face in the bed, sniffed, and took in his lingering scent. I didn’t want to lose that moment we shared so intimately together. The entire night kept running through my mind. Preston’s naked, muscular, caramel body glistening next to mine. His tender kisses, and his massive hands caressing my body. I was feigning to touch him.

Damn, Preston was all that and he gave me all that!

In the meantime, I hoped on the computer and googled Preston. Oh you best believe I checked him out. I mean what person wouldn’t? Normally I would not have done it, but I wanted to know more about this talented basketball player. I had to find out his stats – height (Preston is a tall dude. I am tall, standing at 6’2, but I felt short next to his long lean muscular body). I checked his weight, rebounds, average points per game, how long he’s been playing, and other vital information.

I was impressed. Preston was on top of his game. The press liked him and he was hometown favorite. In high school and college he was an all-around favorite, traveling across the country showcasing his talented ball-handling skills. The more I discovered, the more I liked. So, I was looking forward to spending more time with this amazing basketball player.

Sure enough, later that evening Preston arrived at my hotel room. A huge smile was plastered on his face when I opened the door. My heart was racing and about to leap out of my chest. I couldn’t contain my excitement for him.

The bed was our next stop. Our naked bodies intertwined and exploring one another. I’m sucking and licking every spot I can get my mouth on. Preston’s moaning and groaning, enjoying the sensuous pleasure I am releasing with each slurping suction from my mouth. Preston returns the favor. He doesn’t stop short of making sure I experience the unrelenting pleasures of his juicy succulent lips. The tenderness in his kisses is like soft raindrops. They fall delicately all over my body – neck, chest, back, stomach, thighs, and my full extended erection.

Preston is it! He is the one. The man. The Don. The Prince with the magic potion. He is the sweetest thing I’ve every known – Lauryn Hill sang this ode to this type of man.

Once again, it’s late. We are lying naked in each other’s arms. Resting in the afterglow.

“You’re a bad boy,” Preston bellows a laugh. “You’re going to get me in trouble.”
“I hope it’s a good kind of trouble,” I look into his dancing romantic eyes.
Preston’s cell phone rings. And rings. And rings. And rings.
“You’re going to get that?” I say.
“They’ll leave a message.”
A few minutes later the cell phones rings, again. And rings. And ring. And rings.
Preston finally grabs the cell phone and pushes the talk button.
“Yeah,” he says. “Wait a minute. Hold up.” He gets out of the bed and his naked body disappears into the other room.

I stare at his rock hard ass as he walks away. He has a perfect athletic basketball body. I make a mental note, Goodness, we have way more sexing to do.

Preston saunters back into the room. His manhood is swinging from left to right. I finally notice the pained look on his face. “Everything cool?” I ask
“Yeah, it’s cool.”

As soon as he is about to climb back into bed his cell phone starts ringing again.
“What?” Preston says flustered. Again he walks out of the room. This time he is engaged in a full-fledged conversation for about ten minutes.

Another mental note flashes in my head, Something is not right. There is something definitely going on I am not aware of.

Check back tomorrow when Preston introduces Terrance to some important people.

Terrance Dean is the Author of “Hiding In Hip Hop – On The Down Low in the Entertainment Industry from Music to Hollywood”


Posted by


  • ALWAYSaLADY says...
  • All I can say is WOW....but seriously, you talked about continuing to grow and learn, I just hope you have learned to stop sleeping with DL men and hooking up with every good looking guy you meet. But considering you have a whole book on your sexual encounters I'm guessing not. I'm saying as a woman I couldn't sleep with a married man knowing that if his wife found out it would crush her or if they had children what it would do to them. I just couldn't be the one to do someone like that for some good dick. Haven't you ever felt bad about possibly being a part of his "lil secret" that could destroy the wife's, girlfriend's, or childrens' life? I know gay men who refuse to sleep with DL men for exactly that reason and plus they respect themselves enough to not be just the lil secret.

  • May 8, 2008 12:42 PM

  • May 8, 2008 12:42 PM
  • An Abomination says...
  • with all of this Power-U-Self-Savioir-Y out here, Y U suckas wanna rub johnsons & push each other's stool in? that's disgusting!

  • May 8, 2008 1:05 PM
  • mizzouri says...
  • I just dont understand how one man can suck another mans dick, its to many women on this earth for you to want to be gay. that nigga is sick

  • May 8, 2008 1:50 PM
  • Disgusted with black folks says...
  • Wow in reading these comments, I can see why the black community will NEVER come togather as a strong community. This brother is telling HIS story, not the story of every black gay man in america. SOHH, chose to feature a section of the book, that shows very little of what this book is really about. Whether some of you choose to believe it or not, this is today's reality. The black women reading this book, may actually learn something about black men and the issues a lot of them face, that could help descrease their chances of contracting the HIV/AIDS. So to my people, I urge you to please support each other, rather than helping the white man bring our race down.

  • May 8, 2008 2:15 PM
  • adrian says...
  • wow this is like a damn gay zane novel! is there a way u can speak about the confessions of a down low man without all the detailed gay sex? Im a female with a very active imagination so while reading this im envisioning everything... I do recognize that you are trying to tell a story but damn...

  • May 8, 2008 2:26 PM
  • Dre Guevara says...
  • @ Mizzouri,

    They're all confused, the faggots & the dykes

  • May 8, 2008 2:27 PM
  • The Professor says...
  • "rather than helping the white man bring our race down."


    So sleeping with married men, and possibly fracturing or destroying a black marriage is not doing so. I suppose making a profit off it all isn't doing this either? You'd rather people help sponsor and support this lunacy in hopes of helping black people's progression? Read what you posted to yourself, out loud, and please reconsider your statements. Please. If you do, I'm pretty sure that you'll discover that you were wrong, or that a white man wrote this and you're actually aiding him in is task of trying to bring us down. Let the church say "Word"...

  • May 8, 2008 2:27 PM
  • Youthful Bystander says...
  • Yo' please dont ruin the credibility of dis man's encounter, how can someone get madd @ him for talkin' about wat really happen'd.. All I gotta say is, if its not 4u--Bitch Begone!!! Cause whether we talk about it or not please remember these encounters are still happening and will continue to happen no matter how many books are written...*Truth is Bi -Guys(c me) read these blogs, but even being exploited or condemned can't stop/won't stop the feeling, desire and/or drive to continue Doin' U!! U dig!

  • May 8, 2008 2:27 PM
  • str84life says...
  • Gay is gross!

  • May 8, 2008 2:35 PM
  • You Are Nasty!!! says...
  • Yo, I just don't get it... Your mama must've dropped you on your head when you were little to be dreaming about another man's johnson in your mouth... Now you're incouraging all these little kids to think that being gay is ok. Well it's not... Stop tryint to capitalize off your your lil gay trists...

  • May 8, 2008 2:51 PM

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