You Got Served ... With a Court Order
Posted on March 24, 2008 9:30 AM
Continued from Plan B: Running
The drive home was long, the car was packed down and cramped and I could hardly move my arms, pinned against the window in the back seat next to the baby in his car seat. But he slept peacefully and obliviously.
What I wouldn’t give for innocence like that. To just lie back in my seat, knowing nothing of the turmoil surrounding me, trusting that it would be taken care of and I would be unconditionally loved and blameless. A million miles from reality. I was in for the fight of my life and there would be no tag team. You know how in tag-team wrestling, how the guy can tap his partner and then the other dude comes in the ring and fights for him, before switching off again? The battle I was in for would have no such reprieve. (I am not a fan, by the way. My grandmother used to sit in front of the TV with a beer watching wrestling for hours).
BD’s first call didn’t come through until early that evening. As he’d taken to checking with the daycare each morning to confirm that I’d dropped off the baby, this morning I actually had. I’d left our son at daycare long enough to load the car up and give BD a chance to make sure he was there before picking him back up again and heading out.
His greatest fear hadn’t been realized until about 4 p.m. when my phone rang.
I seriously considered not picking up at all. But I had to answer the phone. Though he may want to involve the police and he’d certainly seek the court’s assistance, what was most important was the way in which I would handle myself from here on out. I’d already left the state without permission, the least I could do was own up to that and let my child’s father know his son hadn’t, God forbid, been hit by a car or something.
Sidebar: I think my continued communication with BD, while leaving and after I’d gotten home, is what kept the judge from throwing the book at me, by the way. It illustrated my intent, which was not to hurt the child’s father, but to seek a better existence for myself and my son. Now whether she’d agree that I, across the country, was the one to give our son a better life was another story).
“Where are you with my son?” He asked in a panic.
“I went back home,” I said in my best impersonation of a calm woman. “I told you I was moving, and I have.”
I did tell him I was moving. He’d asked me one day while we were living apart. I sidestepped the question, finally saying yes, I did want to go back home, I just did not know when. Actually, at that time, I did know when. This would also later come up in court.
My lawyer would also later tell me it’s too bad I confirmed that I had actually “moved” on the phone that day. Otherwise it could have easily been a vacation or a trip to visit family, a misunderstanding to help me escape catching a charge. (Of course this would also mean I’d have to return at the close of that vacay). Thank God I didn’t need that defense though, because after my clear admission, I certainly had none.
“You can’t do that!” BD creamed into the phone. “I knew it! I knew you took him!”
“I’m sorry, BD. I had to. I couldn’t stay there with you.” Still calm.
“With me!? You told me to leave and I left! I did everything you asked me to do!”
Yeah, he'd left for an apartment 20 feet away.
“Do you have my mother’s address?” I asked? “That’s where we’ll be. It’s 65 Shore Drive, and the zip code, is –“
“I know where your mother lives,” he intrjected. “I can’t get out there.”
I hadn’t been inviting him.
“I just want you to know where our son is. And I don’t want to take him out of your life, I just can’t continue to live there anymore.”
“You don’t want to take him out of my life? Whadyou think stealing him and running 13 hours away is? This is kidnapping!” He yelled as if receiving a revelation. “I’ll have you arrested.”
The threat didn’t rattle me nearly as badly as it had the last time. The friendly lawyer that gave me the free advice already told me that it was very unlikely that cops from my state would come to the door and take my child from me on papers from out-of-state authorities, or that they’d act of family court matters from across state lines.
BD hung up on me, I assumed to call the police.
About an hour later though, I was getting more calls. Not from BD but from the same area code. I didn’t pick up. There was no sense in us arguing about it. I was gone and I wasn’t turning around. He would do in rebuttal whatever he was gonna do.
Later that night I checked my messages and had two from a Judge Lauren Hope.
“Hi, this message is for Melyssa Ganache. Ms. Ganache this is Judge Hope, I’m calling you from my chambers because there’s a Mr. BD here who is filing a complaint against you for kidnapping. He says you have left the state with the child you two share. Please give me a call back so I can speak with you about this matter. If I don’t hear from you, I’ll be forced to accept his application for a hearing.”
It was too late to return the phone call.
Three days later the summons arrived at my mother’s front door. I ripped the envelope open anxiously. I’d been expecting this. I was being ordered to appear at an emergent hearing. It stated that the matter was urgent and “detrimental harm” could be caused to the child if custody was not “immediately remanded to the father.”
The court date was only a week out. It didn’t even make sense to finish unpacking.
Check back tomorrow as Melyssa goes her first round in court and comes out empty handed.
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Get more Melyssa at GetYoShyt.blogspot.com and hit her up on Myspace.com/MelyssaGanache.
*All names have been changed to protect the guilty & the innocent.
Posted by Melyssa Ganache
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Comments
Why must he take it this far i understand you share custody but to make accusations of harm just because he didnt want you to move is crazy.
wow! this dude is persistent! i must say you got urself into some ish! but at least u are trying to fix it! Good for u and God Bless!
Wow...I can't believe that he really went to court and said that you kidnapped your son. I am not denying his love for his son, but again this is all part of his control issues. You left to better yourself and get out of that situation. Even with him out of the house you were still living like a prisoner. Him calling the daycare every morning to check that the baby was dropped off, and then calling at night to make sure his son was home. That was a bit extreme. With most breakup's we know that the mom becomes the sole caregiver for that child because he or she resides under the same roof with her. From the beginning there was no logically reasoning with BD. So you should have know that he wouldn't make it easy for you to live your life the way you wanted with you guys being apart. The sad thing is the baby suffers cause now you'll be back and forth in court fighting for you son....Can't wait for tommorow's entry...
I feel what your sayin but you still shouldn't have taken the child. Maybe you should have pulled one of his moves and gotten the authorities involved. And if you REALLY were this scared when that nigga hit you you should have called the authorities if it's as serious as you say. But by you allowing it to linger on you compromised that man's feeling as crazy as he is you played with his feelings and him and you f'ed his best friend. I don't know shorty I too would like to hear ol' boy's version because it just seems your leaving something out.
i kno on the other blog i was going off on you but now i must commend you for your bravery. men like bd are crazy and eventually he would probably beat u again if u didnt take action. that was a good move but u shoulda been told the police about when he beat you cuz u woulda been a lil more better off... cant wait til tomorrow tho!
He acts like a damn bitch.Always calling the police on somebody.He's a hoe!!!!!
IF HE WANTED A FIGHT I'D GIVE HIM ONE
I'M SOMETIMES LIKE AN ELEPHANT I NEVER FORGET!!!!!!!!!
AND AS FOR THE KIDNAPPING THING IF I GAVE BIRTH TO A KID IT IS MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND I REFUSE TO GIVE A MAN MY KID WITHOUT A FIGHT
DUDE'S TEETH WOULD HAVE GOT KNOCKED DOWN HIS THROAT IF HE HAD PULLED THAT WIT ME
GAME REGCONISE GAME
I think you should go ahead and admit that you did this for none other than selfish reasons, because you had the position of power. He got out the apartment like you asked and moved to a place where luckily he could be close to his son, which was convenient to and good for the child. He called the daycare because either he was a concerned father or worried that you would do what you did, probably a result of previous threats by you. He called the police as opposed to coming at you (damned if you do, damned if you dont), seems like pretty sane actions, until you put a ill spin on them. The trial over now, you luckily got off, no need to put 2 on the 10 now like its a Law and Order tv drama. I call SHENANIGANS!
Reading that post kind of made me mad. Here you are talking calmly to BD like you didn't do shit wrong. Here you go again making that stupid mistake of picking up the phone when your in the process of taking his and your son, like that would make everything OK. I don't know what the hell is wrong with you ? But you are the type of person that get into situtition and not think or don't care of the consequences. Here you are once again trying to pull a fast one on BD like you did that night you stayed over Digital's house, called BD and told him that you won't be coming home and that he couldn't come get you. BD has some problems but you were just making them worst by not thinking. You could of got the courts in this and told them to make up a system of visiting rights but you didn't. However I don't expect much for you so I wouldn't expect you to that anyway.
@nnl and Dr. Flav
So what I'LL TAKE MY KID TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH IF I WANT TOO
HOW IS SHE KIDNAPPING WHEN SHE'S THE CHILD'S CUSTODIAL PARENT??????
She should of got the law invovle before she though to just dip out. But like I said she don't think she just do. You can't say she was the custodial parent because she never went to court or anything like that.
Comments written above do not represent the views or opinions of SOHH.com, 4CONTROL Media, Inc. or any of its affiliates. Comments may be deleted at our sole discretion.